Taming Your Inner Cynic

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Any jackass can kick down a barn, but it takes a carpenter to build one. – Sam Rayburn

The story is told of a judge who had been frequently ridiculed by a conceited lawyer. When asked by a friend why he didn’t rebuke his assailant, he replied, “In our town lives a widow who has a dog. And whenever the moon shines, it goes outside and barks all night.” Having said that, the magistrate shifted the conversation to another subject. Finally someone asked, “But Judge, what about the dog and the moon?” “Oh,” he replied, “the moon went on shining–that’s all.”

One of the dangers you face as a leader is in developing a cynical attitude. You try your best as a leader to keep a strong positive attitude; after all, you are the one setting the example for others. But we all know that the mental, physical, and emotional toll of being a leader can get to the best among us at times.

Symptoms of cynicism are obvious- if not to you, then to others around you. A cynical leader thinks worse-case scenarios, has an outlook that is more negative, and is too quick to notice the flaws in other people. He tends to second guess peoples motives and is increasingly insecure. This type of behavior can be viewed as “out of character” by those who know you best and are signs that cynicism has taken root.

Taming your inner cynic can be challenging. There are just some days and some people who will take you to your limit. I get it.  So what is a leader to do? Here are five suggestions to help you come back to the bright side.

Choose to be thankful

Instead of being quick to complain about how bad things are why not choose a thankful attitude instead? When you shift your focus to all of the good in your life then your attitude will begin to change. It becomes harder to be negative with a thankful heart.

Choose to be quiet

Cynical people tend to not only be negative but often time very vocal. Instead of saying the first negative thing that comes to mind why not just pause; take a deep breath, and keep that thought to yourself. You never have to apologize for the words you don’t say.

Choose to listen

Cynical people can be that way because they are formulating thoughts, opinions, and attitudes often with incomplete information. A good idea for you as a leader is to listen to your people and gather facts before you speak or make a decision.

Choose to take some down time

There is an old saying, “All work and no play makes Jack a dull boy,” that should be taken to heart. I’m convinced that most cynicism in leaders is attributed to this thought.  It is important for all leaders to have quality down time to re-charge and re-connect– to rest and be restored mentally and physically. Leaders need rest.

Choose to make a difference

The attitude at the top of the organization tends to be the one throughout the organization. As a leader you carry that responsibility. The daily choices you make are critical not only for your well-being but for those you lead.

No leader is immune from stress and each battles the temptation to be cynical at times. But know this: cynicism is a choice and is a reflection upon your leadership style. The discipline of a good attitude over being cynical is winnable. The outcome rests in your daily choices.

In closing, let me leave you with some inspiration from the Anyway poem attributed to Mother Teresa:

People are often unreasonable, illogical and self-centered;

Forgive them anyway.

If you are kind, people may accuse you of selfish, ulterior motives;

Be kind anyway.

If you are successful, you will win some false friends and some true enemies;

Succeed anyway.

If you are honest and frank, people may cheat you;

Be honest and frank anyway.

What you spend years building, someone could destroy overnight;

Build anyway.

If you find serenity and happiness, they may be jealous;

Be happy anyway.

The good you do today, people will often forget tomorrow;

Do good anyway.

Give the world the best you have, and it may never be enough;

Give the world the best you’ve got anyway.

You see, in the final analysis, it is between you and your God;

It was never between you and them anyway.

© 2015 Doug Dickerson

 

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Three Difficulties Every Leader Should Embrace

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When we long for life without difficulties remind us that oaks grow in contrary winds and diamonds are made under pressure. – Peter Marshall

An old woodsman gives this advice for catching a porcupine: “Watch for the slapping tail as you dash in and drop a large washboard over him. The washboard will give you something to sit on as you ponder your next move.”

As a leader dealing with difficulties is not a new phenomenon to you. Workplaces are an ever present source of stress in people’s lives. The American Institute of Stress (http://bit.ly/1i5E7Zs) identified workload as the number one cause of stress by employees followed by people issues, juggling work and personal issues, and lack of job security.

Because you are surrounded by so many people who are stressed it’s important to keep your leadership skills sharp. Difficulties will come to you as a leader. But here are three you should always welcome because in doing so you will be a stronger and more effective leader.

The difficulty of personal growth

You have to take ownership of your personal growth as a leader. Your effectiveness in leading your team hinges on your ability to lead yourself. It’s all too easy to put personal growth on the back-burner; after all, we are stressed ourselves. We have meetings to attend, clients to meet, personnel issues to resolve, deadlines that are looming, and the list goes on.

But no amount of busyness will ever replace your need for a personal growth plan. How can you grow leaders around you if there is no growth in you? Regardless of how busy your life is you need to find the time to read, join a mastermind group, attend workshops, listen to audio CD’s during your morning commute, etc. Conquering the difficulty of personal growth can be a challenge but it’s a non-negotiable if you want to be effective.

The difficulty of forward thinking

The bedrock principles of leadership such as trust, loyalty, ethics, values, communication, etc. are your foundations. They are the principles you stand upon that keep you grounded as a leader. They are timeless. But your effectiveness as a leader also rests with your ability to adapt to your present circumstances with forward thinking.

This can be difficult for a leader because it’s all too easy and much too predictable to stay in our comfort zones. But the comfort zones of yesterday will not always serve you well tomorrow. The challenges are new and different. Business is not just local; it’s global, and the way we communicate is ever evolving. Forward thinking combined with timeless values can position you for the future and the challenges you face. Let your values be your guide but keep an open mind.

The difficulty of building community

Building community is an emotional investment and challenge that many leaders are just not up for. It can be a thankless job. It’s difficult. I get it. But your success as a leader and the successes of your organization are directly tied to a strong sense of community and relationships. And it begins at the top.

John Maxwell says, “Don’t ever underestimate the importance of building relational bridges between yourself and the people you lead. There’s an old saying: To lead yourself, use your head; to lead others, use your heart. Always touch a person’s heart before you ask him for a hand.” When you embrace what is difficult about building relationships it will revolutionize your leadership and your results.

The simple truth is this: people are your most appreciable asset. People are more important than your brick and mortar, product or location. When you get community and relationships right then everything else will fall into place.

Being a leader is not always easy but it’s very rewarding when you embrace what’s difficult. When you do it changes everything.

What do you say?

 

© 2015 Doug Dickerson

 

 

 

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Leadership Minute: Disturb Your Routine

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The best cure for a sluggish mind is to disturb its routine. – William H. Danforth

Have you ever been in one of those funks where you just couldn’t seem to find a way out? You know the state of mind I speak of – you’re in a rut where creativity is stagnant, you are not clicking on all cylinders like you are accustomed to, and you feel like you are banging your head against the wall. At some point in time we have all been there. One of the best ways to break out of that sluggish state of mind is to disrupt your routine. Disrupting your routine can be liberating and can help you gain some much needed perspective. When your routine becomes too predictable and robotic it can dull your senses to things going on around you. A little variety in your day can be therapeutic. Adding some variety to some otherwise predictable routines can help stimulate your mind and give you a different point of view. When it comes to a sluggish mind don’t be afraid to cause a disturbance.

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Leadership Minute: Building Blocks

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One measure of your success will be the degree to which you build others up who work with you. While building up others, you will build up yourself. – James E. Casey

Building others up is one of the simplest and most effective things you can do as a leader. Your ability to influence and build up others can be a real game changer. When you take the time to acknowledge a colleague, congratulate on a job well done or give a word of encouragement, you have no idea the impact it can have. Perhaps that person is having a bad day and you’ve just renewed their faith in your leadership. You just never know the private struggle the other person is carrying. But because you are a leader who builds others up you can make their day. Will it come back on you in positive ways? Of course it will. But as you grow as a leader you will soon discover the joy of being the blessing more than receiving it.

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Leadership Minute: What’s for Breakfast?

breakfast

Expect problems and eat them for breakfast. – Alfred A. Montapert

Leaders have problems. It just comes with the territory.  The fact that you have problems is not an indicator that you’ve done something wrong – in most cases it’s the opposite. The more you remain determined to move ahead, work hard, and do the right thing, the more problems you will acquire. So the issue is not about how to live a problem-free life as a leader. The issue is how to take control of your problems and use that energy to further your goals. Every successful person faces opposition and contends with problems. Don’t know where to begin? First and foremost it begins with your attitude. How you see your problems determines whether they will get the best of you or if you will eat them for breakfast. When your attitude is positive and your resolve is strong there is no problem that can overtake you. Problems – the breakfast of leaders!

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The Power of Purpose-Driven Leadership

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When you’re surrounded by people who share a passionate commitment and common purpose, anything is possible. – Howard Schultz

There is a story involving Yogi Berra, the well-known catcher for the New York Yankees, and Hank Aaron, who at that time was the chief power hitter for the Milwaukee Braves. The teams were playing in the World Series, and as usual Yogi was keeping up his ceaseless chatter, intended to pep up his teammates on the one hand, and distract the Milwaukee batters on the other. As Aaron came to the plate, Yogi tried to distract him by saying, “Henry, you’re holding the bat wrong. You’re supposed to hold it so you can read the trademark.” Aaron didn’t say anything, but when the next pitch came he hit it into the left-field bleachers. After rounding the bases and tagging up at home plate, Aaron looked at Yogi Berra and said, “I didn’t come up here to read.”

The story is a great reminder of why having and knowing your purpose is important. Do you know your company’s mission or vision statement? If not, sad to say, you are not alone. According to a survey conducted by TINYPulse (http://bit.ly/1puoP3z) of over 300 hundred companies and 40,000 anonymous responses, the survey revealed that only 42 percent of employees know their organization’s vision, mission, and values.

If your employees do not know your company’s vision, mission, or values then they will be poor representatives of your company. If you, as the leader, have not clearly communicated those core values then you have fallen down on the job. How can your employees represent what they do not know? Purpose-drive leadership is essential to your success. Here are three reasons why.

It gives context to your past

In order to understand where you are and where you are going it is important to understand your past. Knowing the back-story of your organization – all the successes and failures and how it emerged in the formative years is foundational information worth understanding.

Marcus Garvey said, “A people without the knowledge of their past history, origin and culture is like a tree without its roots.” Seek to understand where you have come from in order to make sense of where you are going. From that knowledge you can have a greater understanding and appreciation for where you are today.

It keeps you focused on the present

When your purpose and vision is clear it gives your employees the focus they need to succeed. If your team is in the dark about its mission and vision they are without the most basic of tools needed for success. Your employees cannot lead your organization to its intended destination if they do not understand why they are going there or the values that will guide them.

A clear understanding of your purpose gives them the ability to focus like a laser on accomplishing their goals and objectives. Just as Hank Aaron was able to tune out the distraction at home plate and hit a home run, so too, will your team succeed when they focus on their mission.

It gives you direction for the future

When you can put your past in context and focus on the present then you can build for the future. When you have a purpose that is known, with employees who are engaged, then you have a future that is promising.

“Even though the future seems far away,” said Mattie Stepanek, “it is actually beginning right now.” Purpose-driven leadership is about empowering and equipping your team. Purpose-driven leadership is the rudder of your ship and will keep you on course. Your future is only as promising as your ability to empower. The time is now to lay claim to your purpose, make known your mission and vision, and discover the possibilities before you.

What do you say?

 

© 2014 Doug Dickerson

 

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Leadership Minute: Serve Well

serve

I have always believed that the best leader is the best server. – Herb Kellleherm

As a leader you wear many hats and juggle many responsibilities. Your leadership journey is one filled with up’s and down’s and everything in between. But what are the defining characteristics of your leadership? Could it be your charismatic personality? After all, people are drawn to vibrant and energetic leaders. Perhaps it’s your track history of great successes that draws people to you. While there could be any number of things to point to that defines you as a leader there is really only one that truly matters. Serving is the ultimate and highest expression of your leadership. When you make serving your priority you set the tone for how customers are going to be treated, how employees will perform, how clients will be represented, how business will be conducted, and how growth will be achieved. Serving is the ‘secret formula” for success and life. When you stop looking inward and start looking outward you can start going forward.

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3 Rules Leaders Should Not Implement

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Most of us have jobs that are too small for our spirits. – Studs Terkel

The late Erma Bombeck once put out a list of widely read “Rules” that was quite popular at the time. Some of them you might recall. Here are a few of my favorites: never have more children than you have car windows; seize the moment, remember all those women on the Titanic who waved off the dessert cart; never go to a class reunion pregnant, they will think that’s all you have been doing since you graduated.

While that list is rather light-hearted and humorous some rules can be stifling as it relates to the operation of your organization. Let’s be clear at the onset; policies and procedures are necessary and this is not about chunking your manuals out the window. Systems operate best when they follow a prescribed course of procedure.

In his book, “It’s Not About the Coffee,” Howard Behar (past President, Starbucks International) pens a fascinating chapter about independent thinking. Behar writes, “We want people to take charge instead of blindly following a rigid set of rules from a book…unfortunately, in many cases the rule book goes too far- it tries to tell people how to be instead of explaining what we’re trying to do. Rules don’t empower, they dispower people. We need recipes, not rules.”

Operating policies and procedures need to be known and adhered to and should be subservient to the person performing them and not the other way around. Yet when rules go too far it can have unintended consequences that can do more harm than good. From the chapter I surmised three rules that leaders don’t need to implement if they want their people and organizations to be successful.

Rules that restrict creative thinking

Unleashing the best and brightest people in your organization begins when you free them from burdensome rules and regulations that hold them back. “Ideally, management should never tell someone how to do something or what to feel. If people’s every last action is dictated to them, they are robbed of their dignity, and the company is robbed of its soul,” writes Behar.

When you give your people the liberty to think, feel, grow and experiment they will surprise you with their ingenuity. When you have more recipes being developed than rules being followed then the possibilities for success are multiplied. Your organization can be incubator for growth and unlimited potential or it can be place where ideas go to die. Which do you want?

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Rules that control behavior

Ideally, your rule book should operate more like a play book. It should contain plays you can call and be filled with options for any scenario that puts you in a position you to score. Behar’s analysis is a timely challenge for managers and executives. He writes, “Instead of writing manuals that lock people into dehumanizing behavior, we should focus on outcomes we want and the reasons behind them…creating tool books instead of rule books grows people’s spirits.” Consider the difference; if your leadership style is to simply be the “keeper of the rulebook” then it will be difficult for your people to grow and reach their full potential and your leadership will be diminished.

When you place your focus on where you are going and why (your vision and purpose) and the growth and development of the people who will take you there, then the rule book must become your play book. When you grow your people’s spirits you won’t have time to worry much about their behavior.

Rules that hinder personal growth

“There’s no better feeling than being encouraged to fully use your abilities,” writes Behar. “You will find your work far more satisfying, and you’ll encourage that same satisfaction in others. Everybody wins. The more we know ourselves and our goals, the fewer rules are needed.” This point is simple yet profound. Your people need more encouragement not more rules.

Fostering a culture of personal growth and development comes when a leader makes it a priority by removing unnecessary rules, by empowering his people, and caring enough to get out of their way. When leaders place more value in rules than relationships then victories are harder to come by and are fewer in number.

The challenge for you as a leader as it relates to rules is to find the right balance between what’s needed and what’s not, if they help your organization or if they hurt it, and ultimately, do your people need the rule to succeed? Your task as a leader is to know the difference.

What do you say?

 

© 2014 Doug Dickerson

 

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Leadership Minute: Venture Out

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Venture outside your comfort zone. The rewards are worth it. – Rapunzel, Tangled

Living your leadership to the fullest begins when you step outside your comfort zone. It can be quite tempting to stay in your comfortable place where things are predictable and safe. But your growth comes when you dare to shed the comfortable surroundings and venture out. You can do this by setting new and more demanding goals, making new friends, or by reading new books that stretch your beliefs. When you venture out you will meet new and exciting people who are exploring just like you. You will soon discover that the reasons you were afraid to venture out were not as bad as you thought they were. In fact you will wish you had done it sooner. So what are you waiting for? Go ahead; venture out, get uncomfortable with being comfortable and grow a little. The rewards of new growth will do you good.

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Leadership Minute: Be Merciful

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Blessed are the merciful, for they shall obtain mercy. – Matthew 5:7 (Jesus)

For all of the attributes ascribed to leaders how high on the list would you place being merciful? After all, leaders are tough, decisive, driven, and are no-nonsense type of people. But drill down to the finer qualities of what makes a leader inspiring and worth following is a sense of mercy that embodies their leadership style. They don’t overlook the obvious and are not afraid to act when times are tough. Leaders lead with a clear set of goals and outcome expectations. But they also understand that life happens and a merciful leader will make allowances. Don’t be so rigid with rules, regulations, policies, and procedures that you fail to see the human equation. Mercy is not weakness. The merciful leader is strong enough to care, gracious enough to show it, and confident enough to live it.

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