Office Dynamics – Page 2 – Doug Dickerson on Leadership

Six Reasons Your Employees Don’t Believe a Word You Say

Posted August 6, 2015
by admin

By Doug Dickerson and Elizabeth Stincelli

“Don’t believe what I say. Believe what I do.” —Carlson Ghosn

Two psychiatrists meet at their 20th college reunion. One is vibrant, while the other looks withered and worried. “So what’s your secret?” the older looking psychiatrist asks. “Listening to other people’s problems every day, all day long, for years on end, has made an old man of me.” “So,” replies the younger looking one, “who listens?”

That humorous story reminds us as leaders of not just the necessity of listening but of the importance of how we communicate. It’s not so much what we say that’s important but that we are leaders who understand why our people should listen to us in the first place.

If your people are tuning you out and not believing what you say then your leadership is on life-support. Knowing the symptoms is the first step in turning things around. If your people don’t believe a word you say then here are six reasons why.

You are self-centered

If you are a self-centered leader your people will not believe you because you are only looking out for yourself. When decisions are made based upon what is best for you –what makes you look good- then you are using your people. Self-centered leadership tends to be manipulative and puts what is best for you above what is best for the team. If you are a self-centered leader you’d better wake up before it’s too late. One day you will look around and you’ll discover that not only are your people not believing you – they are not following you either.

You are inconsistent

Inconsistent actions produce inconsistent results. The flow and continuity of your leadership is essential to your success. If you say one thing and do another then those very actions will lead to mistrust and will marginalize your leadership. Flexibility is a must for any team moving forward. Unexpected things happen and your people will have to learn to go with the flow. But if you are inconsistent in terms of what you communicate or how you treat them it will be impossible for them to move forward or have faith in your leadership.

You don’t have their backs

Nothing will empower your team faster than having the backs of your people. A good leader knows this. But your people will not believe you if your message to them says “I have your back” yet you are nowhere to be found when they need you. When you empower your people and have their backs you create a momentum that can take your team to new levels of success. Don’t squander the drive, motivation, and ingenuity of your people by failing at this one critical element of your leadership. If you have the backs of your people they will have yours.

Your ego is front and center

If, as a leader, your ego is front and center, your employees won’t believe a word you say. Your ego can prevent you from seeing the world as it really is; you begin interpreting reality through your own biased lens. When your ego is front and center you send the message that your opinion is the only one that matters. Soon your employees, tired of hearing about how you know everything, will stop listening to you at all.

You lead with fear

If you lead with fear you will never earn the trust of your employees and they won’t believe a word you say. Fear stimulates the fight or flight response. In this state of mind, there is no higher-level cognitive thinking. When you lead with fear your employees disengage and become more focused on protecting themselves than what you are saying. Your attempt to control your employee’s behavior through fear will result in distrust and will undermine your ability to share your message and vision.

They don’t feel valued

Our success is deeply intertwined with our ability to collaborate. When your employees don’t feel valued they lose interest in continuing to try to contribute to the team. They withdraw and you lose the value of their unique skills and knowledge. Your employees need to have a voice and to have their individual contributions recognized and valued. Communication is a two-way street and when your employees don’t feel valued, you lose their respect which has a negative impact your ability to communicate and influence as a leader. When your employees don’t feel valued they won’t believe a word you say.

The key to leadership is trust and influence. If your people don’t believe a word you say, you have lost your ability to lead. It’s time to evaluate your leadership. Is your leadership self-centered or inconsistent? Do you have your employee’s backs? Is your ego front and center? Are you leading with fear? Do your people feel valued? Answer these questions honestly, make a change, and start leading today.

Elizabeth Stincelli is passionate about recognizing and inspiring the leader in each of us. She is the CEO of Stincelli Advisors where she focuses on helping organizations engage employees and improve organizational culture. Elizabeth holds a Doctor of Management degree with an emphasis on organizational leadership.

Learn more about Elizabeth by visiting her website, stincelliadvisors.com and connect with her on Twitter @infinitestin, Google+, and LinkedIn. You can contact her by email at [email protected].

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Why Do The Good Ones Leave?

Posted May 7, 2015
by admin

If your actions inspire others to dream more, learn more, do more and become more, you are a leader. – John Quincy Adams

How is the organizational culture where you work? How is morale? Depending on the day and when asked, the answers can run the gambit of responses and emotions.

A document was discovered in the ruins of a London office building. It was dated 1852. Here are a few of the notices that were posted for a group of employees: 1) This firm has reduced the hours of work, and clerical staff will only have to be present between the hours of 7 a.m. and 6 p.m. weekdays, 2) Now that the hours of business have been drastically reduced, the partaking of food is allowed between 11:30 and noon, but work will not on any account cease, 3) No talking is allowed during business hours, and 4) The craving for tobacco, wine, or spirits is a human weakness, and as such is forbidden to all members of the clerical staff.

Would you like to reconsider your answer about morale in your organization now?

Here’s what we do know from polling and surveys, like this one from Gallup (http://bit.ly/1uUCjpX) that reports employees are just not as engaged as they once were.

It’s been said that people don’t quit organizations, they quit leaders. It’s a sad but true commentary on the lack of leadership skills that are so desperately needed in the workplace.

There are consequences to poor leadership and where it’s not present, people will leave to find it. Inevitably it’s the good employees who leave. Left behind is a weakened and demoralized team forced to pick up the pieces.

But why do the good ones leave? What is the tipping point in which a good employee will cash in the chips and bolt? The specifics vary, of course, but typically the good ones leave for these reasons.

The good ones leave because of leaders with no backbone

This type of leader plays to the crowd and will say whatever he or she thinks you want to hear. The good ones had rather hear the uncomfortable truth than the pleasant sounds of an appeaser. The good ones want a leader who is not afraid to make the difficult decisions.

The good ones leave because of leaders with no vision

The good ones long for and thrive in an environment where the leader has a vision for the future, can articulate it, and sets a course of action that will take them there. The good ones understand that without a clear vision for the future there is no future to be had by staying.

The good ones leave because of leaders with no skin in the game

It will be hard to command the respect of your people if you have no skin in the game as it relates to your organization and its mission. You can’t expect a buy-in from your people if you are not fully invested yourself. The good ones seek to be with leaders who are as passionately invested as they are.

The good ones leave because of leaders who place limits on their potential

The good ones will thrive in a culture of excellence where their hard work and talents are put to best use. The good ones will not sit idly by while the leader plays politics or favorites and be denied the opportunity to advance professionally.

The good ones leave because of leaders with no accountability

The good ones fundamentally understand that accountability and transparency are the cornerstones of success. When a leader no longer feels the need to be transparent or be accountable for his or her actions, then the good ones will not stay. Trust is like glue for the leader, is there is none, people won’t stick.

The good ones leave because of leaders with no boundaries

Ultimately, the leader is responsible for the culture of the organization. If proper boundaries are not being observed and inappropriate behaviors are being tolerated- such as bullying, then the good ones will not stay in that environment.

The good ones leave because of leaders with no integrity

At the end of the day it all comes down to the integrity of the leader. The good ones want their leader to be a person of integrity and one they can trust. If integrity is lacking in the leader then integrity will be lacking in the culture. The good ones will leave to avoid the connection.

Many personal factors contribute to the reasons why the good ones tend to leave and move on. I’ve discovered that it’s not always for the money or a promotion. The good ones understand the wisdom of the words of John Maxwell who once said, “Everything rises and falls on leadership.” That’s why the good ones leave- to be with good leaders.

What do you say?

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Random Acts of Leadership

Posted April 30, 2015
by admin

Leadership is practiced not so much in words as in attitude and actions. – Harold S. Geneen

In his book, Everyday a Friday, Joel Osteen shares a story about a letter he received in the mail one day during his early days of pastoring. It was during a period of time when he was filled with much self-doubt. The letter was from John Maxwell.

Although at the time they had never met, the letter was filled with words of encouragement and hope. “I watched you on television on Sunday and you were outstanding. I’ve got to tell you, you’ve got what it takes,” Maxwell told him. He also shared suggestions and advice on how to be less nervous and how he prepares for when he speaks.

Regarding the letter, Osteen said, “He had forty years of experience, and he was voluntarily pouring it into a man he’d never even met before. He didn’t have to do that. He’d already won. But John understands this principle: True success is when you reach back and bring somebody along with you.”

That John Maxwell didn’t have to write that letter is a given, that he did write that letter speaks to the power of random acts of leadership.

It’s been said that the soft skills of leadership are the hardest. That may be true. Leaders shoulder a great responsibility and results are important. But it’s as leaders understand that unless you get the soft skills right it will always impede your growth and the productivity of your team.

Striking the right balance in your relational skill set is important. You want and expect your team to be productive without sacrificing the relational skills that create the culture you work and thrive in.

Random acts of leadership follows the principle of random acts of kindness. It’s a leadership philosophy that that revolves around the idea that we are all in this together and when we care for one another we all win.

What does random acts of leadership look like? I submit to you that it’s not complicated. Here are a few ways you can show it.

Give unconditionally

The letter John Maxwell sent to Joel Osteen is a classic example of giving unconditionally. It was unsolicited with no expectation of anything in return. It was just an act of generosity that made a difference. Giving unconditionally is a random act of leadership that says, “I get it. I see your struggle, I’ve been there. I believe in you.” And then you act on it.

Listen attentively

Now and then people just need to vent. They may not need you to be their “answer man” but rather just to listen. For all of its rewards, leadership can be lonely and having a confidant to go to can make a world of difference. Your random act of leadership can simply be taking a friend to lunch and being a sounding board.

Connect intentionally

It is incumbent upon you as a leader to connect with your people. Don’t wait for them to take the first steps – you do it. A good leader initiates. Whether you have been brought together with your people by choice or by coincidence, take the first steps to building the relationship. Connecting intentionally is a random act of leadership that seeks to know, relate, and broaden the circle of influence for everyone.

Praise generously

Nothing can demoralize your people any quicker than work gone unnoticed or a team member not appreciated for their efforts. Understand this: People are your most appreciable asset and how they are treated matters. Random acts of leadership –showing appreciation for a job well done, will go a long way in building that person up and boosting morale in your organization. Be generous in praising your people.

These are but a few of the random acts of leadership that will make a difference. What would you add to the list?

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Becoming a Better Team Player

Posted March 27, 2015
by admin

If a team is to reach its potential, each player must be willing to subordinate his personal goals to the good of the team. – Bud Wilkinson

To highlight its annual picnic one year, a company rented two racing shells and challenged a rival company to a boat race. The rival company accepted. On the day of the picnic, everyone entered into the spirit of the event. Women wore colorful summer dresses and big, floppy hats. Men wore straw skimmers and white pants. Bands played and banners waved. Finally the race began.

To the consternation of the host company, the rival team immediately moved to the front and was never headed. It won by 11 lengths. The management of the host company was embarrassed by its showing and promptly appointed a committee to place responsibility for the failure and make recommendations to improve the host team’s chances in a rematch the following year. The committee appointed several task forces to study various aspects of the race. They met for three months and issued a preliminary report. In essence, the report said that the rival crew had been unfair.

“They had eight people rowing and one coxswain steering and shouting out the beat,” the report said. “We had one person rowing and eight coxswains.” The chairman of the board thanked the committee and sent it away to study the matter further and make recommendations for the rematch. Four months later the committee came back with a recommendation: “Our guy has to row faster.”

We hear much today about teamwork and intuitively we understand its importance. Unfortunately, too many want to sit in the boat and shout out instructions and too few want to row.

Becoming a better team player is an evolving process. It requires continual work and evaluation. Perhaps a few questions are in order to help you gauge your effectiveness as a team player in your organization. Here are a few for starters.

Is my niche still a fit?

Every team player has a niche as it relates to his or her role on the team. It’s important to know what it is. It’s even more important as time goes on to make sure that your growth and the growth of your organization are in harmony. If the team has outgrown you, or you have outgrown the team, then adjustments need to be made.

Do I still have the right motives?

Effective team players think “we” over “me”. If that has changed or you’ve succumbed to playing politics to get your way then perhaps you are not the team player you once were. Team players at heart are selfless and are willing to set aside their personal agendas for the good of the team.

Am I supportive of my teammates?

A good team player doesn’t allow petty jealousies to take root and can celebrate the accomplishments of fellow teammates. Why? Because when one succeeds the team succeeds. Being a good team player is about being a good sport. When you are willing to share the spotlight eventually it will shine on you.

Am I still coachable?

The most difficult player on any sports team is the one who thinks he knows it all and can’t be coached. This type of attitude is drain on the rest of the team. When a team member goes rogue it creates a vacuum that other team members have to step up and fill. So be honest; are you still coachable? A smart leader knows there is still more to learn and a wise leader is humble enough to acknowledge it.

Am I still passionate?

A good team player is passionate about the mission and vision of the organization. Do you still have that ‘fire in the belly” that inspires you to be your best, give your best, and bring out the best in your teammates? That type of passion is what championship teams are made of and is what will see you through adversity and lead you to victory.

Baseball great babe Ruth said, “The way the team plays as a whole determines its success. You may have the greatest bunch of individual stars in the world, but if they don’t play together, the club won’t be worth a dime.” That is the secret to the success of your team and it’s the secret to your success as a team player. As you commit yourself to your teammates the possibilities of great success can’t be overstated.

Becoming a better team player is about intentionally looking inward from time to time and making adjustments where needed.

Are you a team player?

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10 Value Statements Every Leader Needs To Know

Posted March 6, 2015
by admin

Try not to become a man of success, but rather try to become a man of value. – Albert Einstein

As a leader, adding value to those around you should be of paramount importance. After all, people are your most appreciable asset. How well are you showing appreciation to the people in your organization?

In a Ragan.com (http://bit.ly/18VETIk) article a survey revealed that 69% of employees would work harder if management better recognized their work. How different would your organization look if 69% of your people were gladly putting forth more effort? By contrast, sixty- three percent of those who don’t feel appreciated plan to leave their jobs within two years. Based upon the way you show appreciation to your people would you expect a high turnover in the next two years?

When the truth about adding value of your people takes root in your heart and mind it will transform your leadership style. Adding value to those you lead takes on many forms. But there’s no easier way to do so than by the words you use to communicate with them. Try these (no particular order) for starters. Use them generously and see the difference it makes.

“We appreciate you”

This value statement speaks directly to your team member as a person. It’s not based on their specific job skill, position, or tenure. It’s simply about them as a person. Relationship building is at the heart of this value statement and it builds the foundation for moving forward.

“You’re making a difference”

This value statement is attached to the contributions your people make. These value statements belong to every person in your organization – from the CEO to the cleaning crew because everyone is important.

“How can I serve you?”

This value statement is an acknowledgement that you rely on your people to make your business work and as a leader you are committed to their success. When your people hear and see that you are 100% invested in them they will react in similar fashion. It creates a win-win scenario for the whole organization.

“Thank you”

These two words add value to your team members because it’s seen as an acknowledgement that you’ve recognized their hard work and dedication in moving the team forward. It’s perhaps the single most powerful value statement you will ever make.

“Let’s work together on this”

This value statement is based upon the notion that we can accomplish more together as a team than we can by ourselves. It’s when we bring our individual skills and talents to the table in mutual collaboration that our productivity can skyrocket. It’s also a reflection of your desire to be involved in the process of reaching those common goals.

“Let’s hear all sides”

This value statement is based on the belief that everyone has a voice that needs to be heard. Keeping your people apart is what hinders growth, fuels mistrust, and creates unhealthy alliances. You add value when you build bridges among your people. Healthy debate sparks creativity and often produces better solutions. It’s about tackling problems, not each other.

“Look at what you did”

Celebrating the successes of your organization and your people is important. You add value to them when you give credit where credit is due. Honor and reward the work of your team and don’t steal their spotlight.

“Go home”

You add value to your people when you give them time to be with the people they value most – their families. Never attempt to build your organization off the backs of your people by insisting they give up family time for company time.

“Here’s where we are going”

This statement is important because it affirms to your people their value in moving forward with the mission and vision of the organization. By keeping the vision before them they begin to see the value they contribute and the service they render as something meaningful that they can take pride in.

“Our team would not be complete without you”

Quite frankly, it’s hard to overstate the importance of people being the most appreciable asset in your organization. There will always be a bad apple here or there, but by and large when you have built and invested in your team that shares common values and goals your potential is unlimited.

Value is built where value is given. Make it a priority and you will go far as a leader.

What would you add to the list?

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When Your Process Replaces Your People

Posted February 27, 2015
by admin

When people go to work, they shouldn’t have to leave their hearts at home. – Betty Bender

John Maxwell shares one of my favorite stories about a turkey chatting with a bull. “I would love to be able to get to the top of that tree,” the turkey sighs, “but I haven’t got the energy.”

“Well,” replied the bull, “why don’t you nibble on some of my droppings? They’re packed with nutrients.”

The turkey pecked at a lump of dung and found that it actually gave him enough strength to reach the lowest branch on the tree. The next day, after eating some more dung, he reached the second branch. Finally after a fourth night, there he was proudly perched at the top of the tree. But he was promptly spotted by a hunter, who shot him down out of the tree.

The moral of the story: BS might get you to the top, but it won’t keep you there.

While the story is humorous the ramifications of it in the way it plays out in the workplace is not. Unfortunately, many employees feel that they are getting BS from their employers. Let me be clear: strong employee engagement is essential to your success in business. And yes, all businesses want a healthy bottom line and rightfully so. But what happens if your business places its processes over its people? Here are three consequences you will potentially face unless you change.

Fractured relationships

It’s been said that people are your most appreciable asset. But when your bottom line becomes your most coveted resource then you have issues. The most essential ingredient to the success of your organization is not having the best business model, location, marketing, or product. It’s your people. They are the life-blood of your organization and the face of your brand. If you only see your people as a means to an end (your bottom line) then you are using your people.

If relationships with your people are fractured the rhythm of your business will suffer. Don’t expect your people to buy-in to your product until you have bought-in to your people. Until you get this right nothing else will be.

Divided loyalties

Here’s the rub: Your people want to be a part of an organization and service that they believe in and have a connection with. They want to be a part of something that is meaningful and contribute in a way that makes a difference. But when their good intentions brush up against a ‘process over people’ mentality it creates division.

Now your people have divided loyalties between liking the service they render and the people they serve and those who are calling the shots. If divided loyalties are widespread among your people then your processes have failed you.

Revolving doors

It’s been said that people don’t quit organizations they quit bosses (leaders). If the execution of your leadership is grounded in policies and procedures over relationships and teamwork then expect high turnover. Simply put; rules over relationship breeds rebellion. Eventually there comes a tipping point when your best and brightest will vote with their feet and find the door.

Let me be clear – boundaries are important and there is a place for policies. But policies and procedures should complement the work of your people and their productivity, not stand in the way of it.

Your organizational culture is tied to your employee engagement. Such fallout as articulated here due to poor employee engagement does not have to define your organization. But whether it does or not is on you as the leader.

Your path forward begins by recognizing that your people are your most valuable and appreciable asset. To that end you must recognize relationships and communication for what is it is – the heartbeat of your organization. Be committed to serving your people, building relationships, and developing leaders. At the end of the day, had you rather be known as the organization with great policies or great people?

What do you say?

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Five Excuses That Kill Accountability with guest co-author Elizabeth Stincelli

Posted February 19, 2015
by admin

“The problem that we have with a victim mentality is that we forget to see the blessings of the day. Because of this, our spirit is poisoned instead of nourished.” – Steve Maraboli

As a leader there are few things more important than creating a strong and healthy organizational culture for your employees to thrive in. It’s up to you as the leader to be proactive and take the lead in developing the organizational climate you wish to have.

Unfortunately, many harmful behaviors threaten the fabric of the culture that you are trying to create. These behaviors include bullying, manipulation, office politics, etc., and they each pose a real threat. But there is one in particular that we would like to address – so here is our question: Is a victim mentality preventing accountability in your organization?

No doubt there are accountability measures in place within your organization that serve to track performance and measure each person’s progress. Accountability measures are healthy and necessary and keep everyone focused on shared goals and outcomes.

But what happens when a team member perpetuates a victim mentality? What does it sounds like? Here are five common claims that will give you some insight.

It’s not fair

The “it’s not fair” mantra is perhaps the oldest one in the book. It can be used when an employee feels that his or her work has gone unnoticed, was passed over for a raise or promotion, or has made an improper comparison of the value of their work in relation to a colleague. Whether justified or not, this feeling of being on the receiving end of unfair treatment is a source of concern. As a leader it is up to you to address it. Accountability makes sense when each person on the team has a clear picture of the value they bring to the organization. Don’t let an employee’s feelings of being slighted go unanswered. When they see and understand their importance they will not see accountability as a threat.

Finger pointing

Finger pointing is so destructive because it’s so easy. It’s the first gesture of the least accountable. Yet sadly, the blame game is alive and well. But clear expectations of employee performance along with useful accountability guidelines will go a long way toward bringing an end to finger pointing and fault-finding. As a leader, you must take ownership of these expectations. When employees can build a collaborative team environment around the idea that “we are in this together”, it can unleash everything that is good and creative about your people. Finger pointing now gives way to mutual accountability, and fault-finding takes a back seat to an “I’ve got your back” mentality. Which would you rather have?

It’s Not My Job

When employees have the mindset that they are only responsible for specific, outlined tasks, it is easy for them to dodge accountability with the simple statement, ‘it’s not my job’. The most effective organizations are the ones where everyone has the opportunity to make an impact. As a leader, you must create a culture of collaboration and teamwork where everyone feels they have a vested interest in the outcome. Let employees see you roll up your sleeves and do what needs to be done regardless of your formal job description. Achieve accountability by replacing the mindset of ‘it’s not my job’ with ‘I benefit when everyone participates as a whole’.

Feeling Powerless

Employees will not take accountability for decisions or tasks which they feel they have no control over. As a leader, you must provide employees with pertinent information and encourage them to ask questions. Then, give them the power to make decisions and design how their work gets done. Accountability will increase dramatically when employees are given power and control over their own work.

Denying Responsibility

Employees often deny responsibility out of fear or frustration. They fear the repercussions for failure or they are frustrated by a lack of clear expectations and control over their work. As a leader, you must create a team mentality. Help employees understand that when one team member fails to carry their weight, they drag down the performance of the whole team. Inspire in them shared values and clearly communicate expectations. Teach problem solving and creative conflict resolution skills throughout your organization. Increase accountability by removing the fear of failure and building employee confidence by giving them a sense of control.

As a leader, it is your responsibility to develop a culture that encourages accountability and discourages a victim mentality. If your employees willingly accept accountability for their decisions and actions, your organizational effectiveness will skyrocket.

*Elizabeth Stincelli is passionate about recognizing and inspiring the leader in each of us. She is the CEO of Stincelli Advisors where she focuses on helping organizations engage employees and improve organizational culture. Elizabeth holds a Doctor of Management degree with an emphasis on organizational leadership. Learn more about Elizabeth by visiting her website, stincelliadvisors.com You can contact her by email at [email protected].

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The Two Faces of Conflict

Posted February 6, 2015
by admin

The harder the conflict, the more glorious the triumph. – Thomas Paine

A story is told of two men who lived in a small village that got into a terrible dispute. They could not resolve it so they decided to talk to the town sage. The first man went to the sage’s home and told his version of what happened. When he finished, the sage said, “You’re absolutely right.” The next night, the second man called on the sage and told his side of the story. The sage responded, “You’re absolutely right.” Afterward, the sage’s wife scolded her husband. “Those men told you two different stories and you told them they were absolutely right. That’s impossible, they can’t both be absolutely right.” The sage turned to his wife and said, “You’re absolutely right.”

Leaders know a thing or two about conflict. And most don’t like it. But conflict or “storming” as I once heard it described, can be beneficial if handled the right way. Much of what you hear in leadership or management circles focuses on conflict “resolution” which is based largely off the belief that conflict is always harmful. But is it? Can an organization embrace a healthy form of conflict that works for the organization in a positive way? I believe so. Here are two key lessons about conflict and their characteristics that you need to know.

The conflict that divides us

There is no denying that unresolved conflict can be very detrimental to an organization. But a greater question needs to be addressed. Do you want the conflict to go away as quick as possible because it makes you uncomfortable or do you want to get to the root of the problem? A Band-Aid approach will not help you in the long run. What are some of the characteristics of the conflict that divides us? Here are a few:

Clashing values. One of the most significant causes of conflict that divides organizations happens over clashing values. When values are not clear, not embraced, or are compromised then the end result will be unhealthy conflict.
Personal agendas. If the people within your organization place their personal agendas over the mission of the organization then conflict that divides will exist. If your people are score-keepers and are only interested in what’s in it for them then perpetual conflict will ruin your organization.
Lack of trust. Most conflict that divides any organization at its root is a trust issue. If team members do not feel they can trust each other- or their leader, then conflict is inevitable. Conflict is the language of lost trust.

The conflict that unites us

As already mentioned, I do not believe all conflict is harmful. If we do not understand the source of conflict that divides us we will have a hard time understanding conflict that can unite us. So how do we make the connection and rally around conflict or ‘storming’ that can bring us together? Here are a few ways:

Mutual trust and respect. It all comes back to trust. If conflict that divides is the language of lost trust then mutual trust and respect is the language that unites us. Values must be clear, mutual, and fully subscribed to in order to move forward as a unified team. Honesty is the key word for conflict that unites.
A focus on what’s best for the team. When personal agendas are set aside for what is best for the organization then every ‘storming’ session is about what’s best for all of us rather than just one. The airing out of ideas then becomes team focused which creates an atmosphere where, because of trust, a free-flow of best ideas can be voiced and no one is threatened. Differences of opinion or approach are now welcomed because no one is questioning motives. It can breathe new life into your organization and creativity can flourish.
Principled leadership. “Everything rises and falls on leadership,” says John Maxwell. It is incumbent upon leaders to position their organizations in a way that fosters healthy conflict by means of mutual trust and respect and open communication. Values must be clear and everyone must be engaged.

Healthy conflict can thrive within your organization but it won’t happen unless there is a principled leader in place who understands the difference. Not all conflict is harmful and not all of it is helpful, but hopefully now you have a better understanding of the two.

What do you say?

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Leadership By The Numbers

Posted January 29, 2015
by admin

Leadership By The Numbers is my new book release exclusively with Amazon Kindle Direct Publishing!

In Leadership By The Numbers you will learn ten powerful leadership lessons to help you grow as a more effective leader. Do you know how to handle your critics? What are the some of the most important habits of kind leaders? How do you map your future as a leader? In this new release I share my insights and answer these questions and more!

In Leadership By The Numbers it all adds up to one thing – adding value and helping you grow as a leader.

You can download the book now at Amazon for just $3.99! Click on the link and make your purchase today!

Order here: http://www.amazon.com/dp/B00SQMLHTC

* This post has been re-sent to you due to a link connection issue that has now been resolved. Thank you!

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4 Traits of Selfless Leaders

Posted January 9, 2015
by admin

It’s difficult to find common ground with others when the only person you’re focused on is yourself. – John Maxwell

You may have heard the story of two friends who met for dinner in a restaurant. Each requested filet of sole. After a few minutes the waiter came back with their order. Two pieces of fish, one large and one small, were on the same platter. One of the men proceeded to serve his friend. Placing the small piece on a plate, he handed it across the table.

“Well, you certainly do have nerve!” exclaimed his friend. ”

“What’s troubling you?” asked the other. “Look what you’ve done,” he answered. “You’ve given me the little piece and kept the big one for yourself.” “How would you have done it?” the man asked. His friend replied, “If I were serving, I would have given you the big piece.” “Well,” replied the man, “I’ve got it, haven’t I?” At this, they both laughed.

One leader’s self-confidence is another leader’s arrogance in the world of perceptions. So let’s put the cards on the table up front- many leaders struggle with acts of selfishness. We want the big piece of fish. It’s not a truth to take pride in but one in which we have to acknowledge if we are going to grow and mature as a leader. In my own leadership journey the biggest mistakes I’ve made along the way can be traced back to selfish acts.

Growing to this new level in your leadership is about overcoming your fears, insecurities, and misconceptions about what it means to lead in a selfless manner. Here are four traits of selfless leaders and why they matter.

Selfless leaders empower their people

The emergence of a selfless leadership style begins by embracing this fundamental principle: until you empower your people they are only spectators. When they are empowered they can produce, achieve, and succeed. Unless you mature in this area as a leader you will never grow to your full potential.

Why does this matter? It matters because in any successful organization it’s empowered team members who run with the vision, fulfill its mission, and achieve its goals. Selfless leaders make it possible not by promoting themselves but by promoting others.

Selfless leaders share the credit

Billy Hornsby once observed, “It’s okay to let those you lead outshine you, for if they shine brightly enough, they will reflect positively on you.” The powerful wisdom of that statement must not be lost on the reality that selfish leaders struggle in this area.

A selfish leader wants to take all of the credit- often at the expense of work others did, and boast “look at what I did.”

Why does this matter? A selfless leader will concede being in the spotlight by putting someone else in it. It matters because each individual who had skin in the game and gave it their all deserve credit. A selfless leader will gladly say, “Look at what we did!”

Selfless leaders initiate the conversation

The mark of maturity in a leader begins to take shape when he or she invites open and honest conversation instead of dodging it. Selfish leaders seek to control the message, the agenda, and in the end stifle creativity and deprive themselves of much needed feedback. If a leader’s head is buried in the sand the view for everyone else is not that pleasant. Instead, a selfless leader engages in conversation with his or her people and makes it a priority.

Why does this matter? A selfless leader understands that open communication is the life-blood of the organization. Disconnected people create disconnected organizations. Selfless leaders build bridges and get people talking because your survival depends on it.

Selfless leaders create the culture

Leaders, whether selfish or selfless, set the tone and create the organizational atmosphere. Through your growth and maturity as a leader you’ve come to understand that people buy in to your actions and attitudes before they embrace your vision. Better to be rejected as a leader because people did not embrace your vision than because they did not embrace your selfish leadership style.

Why does this matter? Selfless leaders understand that value is created where value is given. Selfless leaders know that when they help others succeed they succeed. It matters because when this is the underlying foundation of your organizational structure it creates an atmosphere where everybody wins, not just a few.

What do you say?

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