Leadership Matters – Page 3 – Doug Dickerson on Leadership

When Critics Come Calling (Part 1)

Posted August 6, 2020
by admin

Criticism is something we can avoid easily by saying nothing, doing nothing, and being nothing – Aristotle

In a Peanuts cartoon Linus is curled up in a chair, reading a book, while Lucy stands behind him with a funny look on her face. Lucy then says, “It’s very strange. It happens just by looking at you.”

“What happens?” Linus asks.

Lucy calmly answers, “I can feel a criticism coming on.”

Criticism. It’s the constant companion of leaders. Hang around long enough and you will come to know this truth about leadership. Click To Tweet

“No leader lives a day without criticism,” said J. Oswald Sanders, “and humility will never be more on trial than when criticism comes.”

What about you? What’s been your experience? How have you dealt with criticism?

Let’s look at three common reactions when critics come calling.

We take it personally

Most leaders I know have a deep sense of pride in their work and otherwise like to think of themselves as good leaders. When critics come calling, it’s a normal reaction to take it personally and get defensive.

Another consideration is the source of the critic. While it can be easy to brush it off as petty behavior from a disgruntled colleague, it especially hurts when it comes from someone we once considered close.

While this is a common reaction, it may not always be the most healthy reaction. More about that later.

We retaliate

A sure sign that we have taken the critics too seriously is that we retaliate. We justify ourselves by pointing out the faults of the accuser. How many times have you, or someone you know gone down this road? How did that work out?

The trap here, if you go down this road, is now you have entered into an unhealthy game of comparison. In order to justify your hurt ego, you now have to engage on the level of the critic in an unhealthy way. Now, by your act of retaliation, you have escalated the situation whereby making amends becomes more difficult because you allowed your bruised feelings to get in the way.

While this may make you feel good in the short-term, you have now put up barriers and slowed any chance of reconciliation.

We put up walls

Among these three common reactions, this is perhaps the most destructive to your leadership. And this reaction has nothing to do with your critics. This response is all on you.

To be sure, no one likes it when critics come calling – especially when the critic has less experience or is nothing more than arm-chair quarterback with no skin in the game. I mean, who the heck do they think they are, right?

But when you choose to put up walls – those defensive measures- it is the one action that hurts you more in the long run. When you cut people off you put yourself in danger of hearing only from the people who will tell you what you want to hear - not what you need to hear. Click To Tweet

So what is a leader to do? What should your posture be when your critics come calling? What can you learn from your critics? These questions and more will be answered in When Critics Come Calling (Part 2).

Final Thoughts

As the saying goes, haters are going to hate. But for you in leadership, there’s no room for that. And while dealing with it comes with the territory, you can rise above it, learn from it, and be a better leader because of it.

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How Leaders Keep Calm in Crisis

Posted April 13, 2020
by admin

Hardships often prepare ordinary people for an extraordinary destiny. – C.S. Lewis

We are living in unprecedented times. We are living during a moment of history that will be read about in the history books a hundred years from now. These are trying times for sure!

How we handle this crisis will be debated for years to come. As leaders, how we step up right now is as important as ever.

As a leader, you might be able to identify with Tom Welling who said, “I have so much chaos in my life, it’s become normal.” Can you relate?

Being a leader does not exempt you from chaos, stress, pressures, and such. If anything, it might add to it.

But as a leader, your style and approach at such times are important. Others are looking to you to see how you react which in many ways determines how they will react.

Your leadership when times are tough will either cause people to lose hope and succumb to despair or it will instill hope and confidence. Click To Tweet In these times, your people need an example of the calming effect that your leadership can have. Here are four ways that happen.

Calm leaders see the big picture

Calm leaders are not rocked by every disruption that comes along. Short-sightedness tends to fuel the insecurities in people. A calm leader can exude confidence because they see the big picture and it’s with that understanding they can lead with a steady hand.

Calm leaders understand timing

One of the hardest things to learn as a leader is timing. We are people of action. Waiting is not necessarily a finer quality. But calm leaders have an intuition for timing. They know when it’s time to wait and when it’s time to act. The calming effect of timing within your organization and with your people can make a world of difference. Calm leaders can help avert a multitude of troubles just by understanding how timing impacts every decision they make. Click To Tweet

Calm leaders challenge norms

Calm leaders tend to challenge norms and stretch others to grow in ways they are not often comfortable with. Call it what you will – human nature, gut reactions, etc., but many people react to things happening to them or around them in ways that only make matters worse. But a calm leader is processing. A calm leader brings peace to the storm, level-headed thinking, and challenges the norms that define the way things have always been done.

Calm leaders bring stability

Calm leaders bring a level of maturity and stability that is often lacking during turbulent times. Calm leaders know that their actions, attitudes, reactions, and thinking go a long way in determining successful outcomes.

Calm leaders are not passive leaders, nor are they passionless. Calm leaders are simply those who know how to harness the power of their intuition, experience, maturity, and wisdom to be a more effective leader. Click To Tweet

Strive to be a leader who, when everything around them seems to be in chaos, brings a calming presence to the situation. We could surely use more calm leaders.

It was Robert Schuller who once said, “Know that tough times don’t last but tough people do.” And we are certainly in the midst of tough times. Be encouraged today and know that we will get through this together!

*This post was adapted from Four Attitudes of Calm Leaders that was originally published to my blog in April 2019.

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The New Normal: The Impact of COVID-19 in Your Daily Leadership

Posted March 15, 2020
by admin

What lies behind you and what lies in front of you, pales in comparison to what lies inside of you. – Ralph Waldo Emerson

For the foreseeable future, we are now living in a new normal. The COVID-19 (Coronavirus) has the world on edge as the virus spreads and death tolls climb. Be it directly or indirectly, everyone has been impacted by it.

Your leadership in this new normal is important. Whether your occupational field is in healthcare, government, retail, financial services, education, religious, corporate, etc. the signals you send as a leader make a difference.

I’m reminded of Churchill’s leadership during World War II. England needed to increase its production of coal. Winston Churchill called together labor leaders to enlist their support. At the end of his presentation, he asked them to picture in their minds a parade that he knew would be held in Piccadilly Circus after the war.

First, he said, would come the sailors who had kept the vital sea lanes open. Then would come the soldiers who had come home from Dunkirk and then gone on to defeat Rommel in Africa. Then would come the pilots who had driven the Luftwaffe from the sky.

Last of all, he said, would come a long line of sweat-stained, soot-streaked men in miner’s caps. Someone would cry from the crowd, ‘And where were you during the critical days of our struggle?’ And from ten thousand throats would come the answer, ‘We were deep in the earth with our faces to the coal.'”

Just as Churchill had to rally the people around a common cause, so too is COVID-19 a challenge all of us face. It’s no respecter of persons. We are all in this together as it were -with our faces to the coal.

What’s needed to lead in the new normal? Here’s a start.

Lead in the new normal with a steady hand

In this new normal, we need leaders with a steady hand. We need leaders with eyes wide open and clear thinking. We need leaders in the new normal who exude confidence and calm.

Leadership Tip: In this new normal you people want steady leadership.

Lead in the new normal with courage

A new normal like ours will require courage to not just lead with a steady hand but speak the truth with authority. It will require courage, boldness, and at times, restraint. Courageous leadership in times of adversity will calm fears and inspire hope. Click To Tweet

Leadership Tip: In this new normal, your people are looking for courageous leadership.

Lead in the new normal with facts

As we see so often in times like this, there’s information overload that’s accessible 24/7. Justifiably so, people want information. As you lead in this new normal, be responsible and communicate with your people factually. When people look to your leadership in these times, be the voice of reason and facts.

Leadership Tip: In this new normal, your people want facts more than hype.

Lead in the new normal with patience

It’s been said that in times of adversity, leaders aren’t made, they are revealed. Your past experiences, both good and bad, have prepared you for moments like this. It’s time for you to step up in your leadership. But in doing so, exercise patience and understanding with those around you. People may be traveling the same road as you, but they may not have all been on it for as long. Let others both learn from and be reassured by your leadership and experience. Click To Tweet

Leadership Tip: In this new normal your people need your patience as you navigate through uncertain times.

Lead in the new normal with compassion

Now more than ever, we need leaders who will step up and model compassion. So many people have been impacted by COVID-19 and many are in a bad place. Leverage your leadership to rally around those in need. This can be our finest hour if we step up with compassionate hearts. Click To Tweet

Leadership Tip: In this new normal, your people need to see compassion in action. We must look out for one another.

Final Thoughts

Even though we are living in a new normal in uncertain times, I believe we will come through it strong. Your leadership in this new normal is essential. When it’s all over, let it be said that you rose to the occasion and led with clarity and confidence. This is your finest hour.

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How Your Attitude Helps Shape Your Company Culture

Posted February 9, 2020
by admin

Everything can be taken from a man but one thing: the last of human freedoms- to choose one’s attitude in any given set of circumstances, to choose one’s own way. – Viktor E. Frankl

I read a story about a young man named John who received a parrot as a gift. The parrot had a bad attitude and an even worse vocabulary. Every word out of the bird’s mouth was rude, obnoxious and laced with profanity.

John tried and tried to change the bird’s attitude by consistently saying only polite words, playing soft music and anything else he could think of to “clean up” the bird’s vocabulary.

Finally, John was fed up and he yelled at the parrot. The parrot yelled back. John shook the parrot and the parrot got angrier and even ruder.

John, in desperation, threw up his hands, grabbed the bird and put him in the freezer. For a few minutes, the parrot squawked and kicked and screamed. Then suddenly it was totally quiet. Not a peep was heard for over a minute. Fearing that he’d hurt the parrot, John quickly opened the door to the freezer.

The parrot calmly stepped out onto John’s outstretched arms and said “I believe I may have offended you with my rude language and actions. I’m sincerely remorseful for my inappropriate transgressions and I fully intend to do everything I can to correct my rude and unforgivable behavior.”

John was stunned at the change in the bird’s attitude. As he was about to ask the parrot what had made such a dramatic change in his behavior, the bird continued, “May I ask what the turkey did?”

Like John, you may be surrounded by people with bad attitudes and you are desperate about what to do.

Did you know that according to an article in Inc., science says that your bad attitude can cost you $3,600 a year? The link was made between cynicism and income and how cynical people make less money.

How about you? Are you allowing a bad attitude and cynicism to generate negative consequences in your life?

The attitude you have contributes to the overall company culture where you work. The same goes for your colleagues. Based upon your attitude and the attitude of those around you, is this concerning? Click To Tweet

Your attitude is important. Here are a few reasons why.

People are watching

Wherever you are within your organizational structure you carry within you a certain amount of influence. This translates into your leadership capacity. So how you handle stress, adversity, challenges, the unexpected, etc. all contribute to an attitude that’s on display. Your attitude by default and whether you like it or not is shaping the culture around you because other people see it.

People are listening

One of the most important things you learn as a leader is how to choose your words carefully. It’s not always easy especially when that special someone at the office has got on your last nerve. I get it. But the way you contribute with your words ought to be a reflection of how you want to add value as a leader. Are your words lifting? Helpful? Encouraging? Know this - your attitude as reflected in your words matters because people are listening. Are you helping your culture or hurting it? Click To Tweet

People are reacting

As a leader in your organization, not only are people watching and listening to your attitude, but they are reacting to it. If your attitude alone was the attitude thermostat that the rest of your organization was set to, what kind of workplace would it be? You may not think that your attitude alone makes that much difference. But what if your attitude was taken and multiplied by 30 employees, 50 employees, or 100, would it matter then? Would you stay and work in that environment?

Final Thoughts

“The greatest day in your life and mine”, says John Maxwell, “is when we take total responsibility for our attitudes. That’s the day we truly grow up.” How about you? It’s time for an attitude check to help shape your company culture in a positive way.

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Ellen Was Right

Posted October 14, 2019October 14, 2019
by admin

Do things for people not because of who they are or what they can do in return, but because of who you are. – Harold S. Kushner

Ellen DeGeneres and former President George W. Bush made news recently. I am sure you heard about it.

The two were spotted sitting next to one another at a Dallas Cowboys football game. For some reason this set off a firestorm as to why the two were laughing and having a good time together. It somehow didn’t fit the mold of some people’s mindset.

How could a gay Hollywood liberal be laughing and having a good time with the former president- a conservative republican?

I believe the answer is more simple than some try to make it. They didn’t look at one another through the lens of a label. They looked at one another through the lens of friendship.

Like Ellen, and like most of you reading this; we all have friends who are different from us. They hold different political views, religious views, and have different sexual orientations, etc. And I, for one, am thankful for this. Our diversity is not our weakness, it’s our strength.

Speaking about the controversy, Ellen said, “We’re all different. And I think that we’ve forgotten that that’s OK that we’re all different”. She added, “When I say be kind to one another I don’t mean only the people that think the same way that you do. I mean be kind to everyone. Doesn’t matter”. Click here to watch Ellen’s statement about the game.

What Ellen said is a reminder for everyone about the need for civility and is also a powerful lesson in leadership. It’s needed today more than ever.

When I released my first book, Leaders Without Borders: 9 Essentials For Everyday Leaders, back in 2010, I believed so strongly that kindness was one of the essential qualities of leadership that I devoted a chapter to it. In the world of leadership, kindness matters.

In leadership as in life, you will cross paths with people who are different from you. Some will be more difficult to lead than others. The challenges are as varied as people. And as a leader, how you treat people and practice the art of kindness will speak volumes about your leadership. Here are a few reminders worth noting.

Treat people the way you want to be treated

This is a timeless principle. It’s a principle that most people were raised on. It’s time to dust it off and live it. Be that leader.

Take the high road

Getting in the mud with the pig might make the pig happy, but you will only get dirty. Your leadership should be marked by what you do to lift those around you. Be that leader.

Be a defender of good

The morale of your organization is only as good as your expectations. Goodness will only prevail as good people rise up and defend it. Be that leader.

Be an example of kindness

In a day and time when we are as divided and polarized as ever, we need more random acts of kindness and leaders who demonstrate it. Set differences aside and do what’s right. Be that leader.

Thank you, Ellen and George, for reminding us what being kind is all about in a not-so-kind world at times. Maybe this one small act will spark something big. Perhaps Ellen will have George on the show to continue the dialogue. I’d love to be there. And yes, George needs to pay back the $6 for the nachos.

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Don’t Throw Your People Under The Bus

Posted September 8, 2019September 8, 2019
by admin

See the light in others, and treat them as if that is all you see. – Wayne Dyer

I read a story about a farm boy who accidentally overturned his wagon-load of corn in the road. The farmer who lived nearby came to investigate. “Hey, Willis,” he called out, “forget your troubles for a spell and come on in and have dinner with us. Then I’ll help you get the wagon up.”

“That’s mighty nice of you,” Willis answered, “but I don’t think Pa would like me to.”

“Aw, come on, son!” the farmer insisted.

“Well, okay,” the boy finally agreed. “But Pa won’t like it.”

After a hearty dinner, Willis thanked his host. “I feel a lot better now, but I just know Pa is going to be really upset.”

“Don’t be foolish!” exclaimed the neighbor. “By the way, where is he?”

“Under the wagon,” replied the boy.

Being under the wagon is not a fun place to find yourself. Sadly, that’s exactly where too many have found themselves as it relates to their boss.

A study reported on in HR Drive says that three out of four people have had a toxic boss. According to a Monster survey they cite, more than one-quarter have described their bosses as “power-hungry” who are looking out only for themselves.

With survey results like this, is it any wonder that many employees feel being thrown under the bus is just part of the culture?

As a leader, how you treat your people speaks volumes about your leadership. While it’s a given that your people don’t want to be thrown under the bus as a result of poor leadership skills, let’s not assume that you understand this.

Here are a few essentials you need to remember going forward.

Your people are the greatest appreciable asset you have

As a leader, your people are the greatest appreciable assets you have. How you treat them, equip them, empower them, invest in them, and serve them reflects on the integrity of your leadership like nothing else will. If you think that I am overstating this, then answer this question – where would you be without them?

Your people want your loyalty and respect

Loyalty is a two-way street. You can’t rightfully expect your people to extend loyalty to you if it’s not been given by you.If all your people do is doctor the wounds from the tire prints left by the bus you’ve thrown them under then don’t expect their loyalty in return. Click To Tweet The respect that you show is the respect you deserve.

Your people don’t care how much you know

You’ve heard the old adage, “people don’t care how much you know until they know how much you care”. And that much is true. But beyond how much you know, they want to know that you are authentic and real. They want to know that you are not only there for them in the good times, but that you will be right there in the trenches with them in the bad times. Your people don’t care as much about the facts and figures in your head, they want to know what’s in your heart. Click To Tweet

Your people are invested in what they help create

More than anything else, your people want to know that they are a part of something greater than themselves. They want to be on a team with like-minded people and know that they are valued. This leadership mindset begins with relationships and is sustained by trust.

In short, your people don’t want to be thrown under the bus by an insecure, ego-driven leader. They want to be on the bus – in the driver’s seat, delivering excellence every day. Don’t be an obstacle to the progress that could be yours. Your people are more valuable as contributors on the bus, not when they are being dragged beneath it.

Additional Resources:

Check out these articles from my archives:

7 Things You Do As A Leader That Your People Can’t Stand

How To Defeat A Culture Of Apathy

Get Off Your High Horse

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It’s All About Your Perspective

Posted September 1, 2019
by admin

One person’s craziness is another person’s reality. – Tim Burton

After a particularly long and bumpy flight, the crew was tired. This was even made more apparent by the rough landing. This particular airline had a policy that the pilot must stand by the door as people exit to thank them for flying with the airline. The pilot was dreading this because of the landing but he stood faithfully by. Surprisingly enough, the people filed off and none said a word. Then came the last passenger, an elderly lady walking with a cane. As she got up to the captain, she said, “Can I ask a question?” “Sure,” answered the captain. “Did we land or were we shot down?”

I’ve been on a few flights when I felt the same way. And in leadership, there have been many times when I felt like maybe I had been shot down.

Our perspective in leadership is shaped by many factors. Often our perspective is driven by our own experiences or biases. It can be driven by the opinions of others. But one thing is certain, we all have perspectives that influence us.

As a leader, the accuracy of your perspective is important. You want to be accurately informed and make decisions that reflect sound judgment. But sometimes our perspective turns out to be wrong. Here’s how.

Your perspective can be wrong when our attitude is wrong

Nothing alters our perspective like our attitude, especially if it’s a bad one. Your perspective is what you see and your attitude determines how you see or interpret it. If your attitude is one that is predisposed to being negative then that’s the lens through which you see things.

This can have unintended consequences for you as a leader. If your attitude bends toward being a bad one or is predominantly skeptical, then do the people around you truly get a fair shake from you? If your attitude bends toward being a bad one or is predominantly skeptical, then do the people around you truly get a fair shake from you? Click To Tweet

Having a good attitude is important to you as a leader. But it takes discipline to work on it and keep it positive. You may have a dozen reasons a day to justify a bad attitude. I get it. But the effects of your attitude determine your perspective. So don’t let a bad attitude reflect in a bad way on your leadership.

Leadership Takeaway: Your people are looking to you for leadership and the right perspective to guide them. Watch your attitude.

Your perspective can be wrong when your assumptions are wrong

How many times have you made a wrong assumption about a person? How many times have you made a wrong assumption about a goal or project within your organization? I know I have. And thank goodness I was wrong!

The mark of sure and steady leadership is found in not rushing to judgment and in not making wrong assumptions. It’s giving other people the same benefit of the doubt you’d want to be given yourself. Click To Tweet

The thin line between your perspective and instincts can be a hard one to differentiate at times. On both counts, you want to get it right. One is innate and learned over time (instincts), while the other is fluid and should never be rushed.

Leadership Takeaway: Your people are looking to you for leadership and for someone to believe in them – not someone to write them off because of a wrong assumption you’ve made about them.

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Pay Attention To The Small Things

Posted August 18, 2019
by admin

I can do small things in a great way. – James Freeman Clarke

Dwight Morrow, the father of Anne Morrow Lindbergh, once held a dinner party to which Calvin Coolidge had been invited. After Coolidge left, Morrow told the remaining guests that Coolidge would make a good president. The others disagreed. They felt Coolidge was too quiet, that he lacked color and personality. No one would like him, they said. Anne, then age six, spoke up: “I like him.” Then she displayed a finger with a small bandage around it. “He was the only one at the party who asked about my sore finger.” “And that’s why he would make a good president,” added Morrow.

The story is a simple reminder about the importance of the little things that make a big difference in leadership. While people measure the worth of a leader by various standards, it was little Anne Lindbergh, who at the age of six, who had the best understanding of it.

It was from John Maxwell a good number of years ago that I learned the leadership principle of walking slowly through the crowd. Too often, leaders are moving so fast and trying to make a good impression that they don’t notice the small things – the small acts of leadership that could be theirs if they just learned to slow down. Walking slowly through the crowd is how Coolidge noticed the sore finger.

How about you? Are you paying attention to the small things? Here are a few things worth considering as you go forward.

Sometimes a small act of kindness is all that’s needed

How many times have you thought it was the big things you do in leadership that made the greatest impact? I think at one time most of us have been there. Let me encourage you today to realize that it’s the small random acts of kindness that can totally change the course of the day for someone else. The truth is, you just don’t know the struggle that others deal with. Your smile or a kind word – while seemingly insignificant to you, goes a long way. Never underestimate the power of a small act of kindness. It can make a world of difference. Click To Tweet

Small things over time turn into great things

“Great things are done by a series of small things brought together,” said Vincent Van Gogh. And I believe it’s true. Paying attention to the small details over time will pay great dividends in the future. It’s as you are faithful in the small things that you move to the big things. This also serves as a great test in your leadership. Can you be patient and trust the maturing process? It’s hard at times for sure. So before you look for the right hand to shake or contact to make, try looking for the sore finger instead.

If you’re not willing to do the small things, you don’t deserve to do big things

I’m a firm believer in servant leadership. Your growth as a leader affords you the opportunity to be in places and positions to better serve others. But if you are not willing to do the small things then you will be ill-equipped to do the big things. Knowing where you are going is important but not forgetting where you came from is essential Click To Tweet.

It’s in the doing of the small things that your character is developed. Wherever your leadership journey takes you never forget the small things. It’s what got you there, and it’s what will keep you there.

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On Becoming a Natural Leader

Posted July 29, 2019
by admin

I yam what I yam and dats all that I yam – Popeye the Sailor Man

An insightful story is told of baseball Hall of Famer Ted Williams. In his prime as a player in the 1940’s-50’s, he was known as a “natural hitter.” He was once was asked about this natural ability and replied, “There is no such thing as a natural-born hitter. I became a good hitter because I paid the price of constant practice, constant practice.”

Williams’ answer reveals the open secret as to what it means to become the best version of you. Practice. And just when you think you’ve got a handle on it – there’s more practice. It’s as simple and as complicated as that.

In leadership, especially among younger leaders, there’s a tendency or temptation to want to rush the process. They want to be at a place in leadership in two or three years that has taken 30 years for others. And while the motivation and desire are commendable, there are no shortcuts on the road to maturity.

Becoming a “natural” is about your daily disciplines. It’s all about paying attention to the small things along the way-things that if practiced regularly will make you a natural leader.

By no means is this an exhaustive list, but it’s a good starting point. This is not about resolving the debate of whether people are natural-born leaders or if they developed. There are some things that do come naturally for some people, and there are obviously some things that have to be developed. But what I am laying out here are some essentials. Let’s see how they resonate with you.

A natural leader has a servant’s heart

The highest form of leadership is not in what others do for you but in what you do for others. It’s not about you. Click To Tweet This attitude is developed not so much in our mindset, which is part of it, but more so in the attitude of our hearts. At the end of the day, it’s about what you give and contribute, not what you take.

The Daily Practice – Put others first.

A natural leader is a life-long learner

This should go without saying, but I’ll say it. Leaders are learners. Leaders are readers. Your growth and development is a lifelong journey. If you are not learning you are not growing. It’s just that simple. Click To Tweet

The Daily Practice – Never stop being a student. Read and learn every day.

A natural leader adapts to change

In life and in leadership, change is inevitable. A natural leader recognizes this and embraces it. It’s a given that not all change is what it’s cracked up to be and it’s also true that not all traditions are worth enshrining. But change is a constant and a natural leader will keep up.

The Daily Practice – Recognize change and embrace it. It will happen with or without you.

A natural leader has a positive attitude

In leadership, your attitude is everything. How you see your life, your work, and your influence is all connected to your attitude. How high, how far, and how well you make this journey all rests on the attitude you have. And as a leader, your attitude is often what others look to more than anything else. Guard it carefully.

The Daily Practice – Check your attitude at the door. Ask yourself – is my attitude today a good example for others to follow?

A natural leader is connected to faith

The practice of faith will vary for each of you. As a person of faith, I do not seek to impose my beliefs and views on anyone. I will simply say this – as a leader you can draw on your faith to keep you grounded, to keep you refreshed, and to give you courage and strength to fulfill your life’s mission.

The Daily Practice – Allow your faith to guide you, strengthen you, and inspire you on a daily basis.

No one ever mastered their trade or achieved greatness as an athlete, writer, or musician, etc.without putting in the time and countless hours of practice. It’s the same for you as a leader. If you want to be a natural leader, there are no shortcuts. Just practice, practice, practice.

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When Saying No is a Good Option

Posted June 9, 2019June 9, 2019
by admin

Silence isn’t always agreement. Sometimes people no longer argue because they no longer care. – Joyce Rachelle

I came across some humorous ways to say no not long ago. Whether you are a person who struggles with saying no or one who relishes the opportunity, I think you’ll enjoy these.

‘I think I’ll go find a lake of piranhas to jump in instead”.

“Has hell frozen over? Then, sure”.

“There are worse things to agree to, I just can’t think of any at the moment”.

“I believe there is someone a lot stupider who would enjoy doing that instead”.

“Let’s not. And stick with that story”.

“I had rather remove my own gallbladder with an oyster fork”.

Saying no. It’s one of those paradoxical terms in our leadership vocabulary. If you are like me, you don’t like telling people no. I use to pride myself in saying yes even when deep down I wanted or needed to say no.

Over the years, I have made much progress in learning how to say no. It’s as liberating as it is refreshing. There have been times when I’ve even surprised myself at how effortlessly it rolls off my tongue – No! But it wasn’t always the case.

What about you, do you struggle in this area of your leadership? Do you find it hard to say no without harboring feelings of guilt or worrying that you will disappoint someone?

As leaders, we bend toward the upbeat and positive and being there for people, etc., etc. I get it. But sometimes saying no is the best course of action. So let me help you try and make sense of when it’s a good time to say no without the guilt that comes with it.

No is a good option when the timing is wrong

Timing has a lot to do with saying no. It may be that what you’ve been asked to do is a great idea, but the time frame is wrong. Along the way, in your leadership, you will have to learn how to say no to good ideas. It comes with the territory. Click To Tweet A yes answer may be an option later, but if the timing is wrong, then it’s wrong. Sometimes saying no to something good today can pave the way to saying yes to something greater tomorrow.

No is a good option if the motivations are wrong

There will be times when people will try to get you to commit to something, and not only is the timing wrong, but their motives are wrong. When someone is trying to take advantage of you or is in some way trying to draw you into their drama or negativity just say no!

No is a good option if your values are in question

In leadership, there are simply no shortcuts when it comes to your ethics, integrity, and values. If any decision you are weighing ever puts those things in doubt then the answer is always no. Roy Disney was right when he said, “When your values are clear to you, making decisions becomes easier”. Saying no is easy when faced with the prospect of compromising your values. Click To Tweet

No is a good option in order to protect your boundaries

At the end of the day, no one is going to protect your boundaries better than you. Finding your work-life balance is on you. You can’t complain about the imbalances in these areas of your life if you don’t know how to say no. Learning how to say no protects your family time, personal time, and professional time. Know when to say no without apology. Click To Tweet

No is a good option simply because you can’t do everything

Regardless of how good you are at what you do, you’re not that great. Neither am I. You are not all things to all people. There are just times when no is in order because you have limitations. Don’t be afraid to embrace your “inner no” voice and own it. You’ll be glad you did.

I’m not advocating saying no just to be contrary or to exhibit a bad attitude or to be less than a team player. I am advocating the reality that at times saying no can be the best course of action for you and it may just be the very thing someone needs to hear.

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