Leadership Matters – Doug Dickerson on Leadership

Conflict Resolution to Communication Resolution

Peace is not the absence of conflict. It’s the ability to handle conflict by peaceful means. – Ronald Reagan

There’s an old story about two men who lived in a small village and got into a terrible dispute they could not resolve. To resolve the conflict, they decided to talk to the town sage. The first man went to the sage’s home and told his version of what happened. When finished, the sage said, “You’re absolutely right.”

The next night, the second man called on the sage and told his side of the story. The sage responded, “You’re absolutely right.” Afterward, the sage’s wife scolded her husband. “Those men told you two different stories, and you told them both they were right. That’s impossible – they both can’t be right.” The sage turned to his wife and said, “You’re absolutely right.”

This humorous story reminds us that during conflict, most people see themselves as on the right side of the conflict. They identify the other party as the ones in the wrong, and the hamster wheel keeps spinning until they eventually “agree to disagree.” In the end, nothing changes, nothing improves, and nothing is gained.

Here’s the principle most people miss: There must be communication resolution before conflict resolution.

We hear and read so much about conflict resolution in many leadership circles. It’s almost as if the primary goal is to be as far removed from conflict as possible – thus producing and generating a “healthy” workplace culture.

As a leader, you can work tirelessly to create an environment where “conflict resolution” abounds and people smile all day. Still, underneath the surface, tensions and the general feeling that peace must be maintained at all costs are causing many to feel as though they are walking on eggshells.

What if there was a better way? What if you could have a culture where healthy disagreements could occur – and dare I say it – it’s encouraged? Imagine a culture where civility and disagreements are welcomed and discussed in a way that moves you closer to your goals and objectives.

Many conflicts at home or work can be traced back to poor communication skills. Listening skills primarily revolve around waiting to respond and not seeking to understand. The list goes on. But when you sharpen your communication skills, you also sharpen – indirectly, your ability to resolve conflict. As a leader, this is an invaluable tool. Let me give you some general starting points for communication resolution. Remember that this is not an exhaustive list, but a good place to start.

Resolve to build trust

Communication rises and falls on trust. If your people don’t trust you, the conflict will be ever-present in your organization. The foundation of resolving conflict is measured by a shared trust that, despite any conflict, is knowing that we can trust each other.

Resolve to bring people together, not keep them apart

The longer people are kept apart, the more prolonged tensions have to fester and boil over. When your team is not sitting down together and communicating, there is more of an opportunity for conflict to grow.

Resolve to listen more than you speak

Your role as a leader is to facilitate communication, not lecture. A good rule of thumb is to talk less, listen more, and weigh in when needed. The more your team communicates with each other, the more they will discover that there is usually more that unites them than divides them. Give them space to figure it out.

Resolve to lead with humility

Your responsibility as a leader is not to walk away from conflict but to open communication channels. It’s not about pulling rank, keeping score, or winning at all costs. It’s about being a servant leader who cares more about your people than winning.

Next week, I will discuss this topic further with you, including some action steps you can implement to help you build a team that understands the value of communication.

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Why Your Perspective Matters

Posted January 8, 2025
by admin
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Success in life comes not from holding a good hand but from playing a poor hand well. – Denis Waitley

A man reads an ad in the newspaper, “Hunting dog for sale, $2,500 but well worth it.” He called the number, and the man told him he had to see the dog. The following day, they met and went hunting early.

The dog flushed two birds from a clump of bushes, and when they fell into the water, he walked on top of the water, grabbed the birds, and walked back on top of the water. The man was amazed and bought the dog on the spot. The next day, he persuaded his brother to go hunting with him. They flushed a couple of birds, and the dog again walked on top of the water, retrieved the birds, and walked back to their boat on top of the water.

He asked his brother what he thought of the dog, and the brother replied, “So you bought a dog that can’t swim?”

The brother’s response is like that of some people you and I know, right? Regardless of how well things may be going, one person will always be the one who can’t help themselves and will see or say something negative. Even though the dog can walk on water, you’ll hear from someone who will notice that the dog can’t swim.

A 2022 PSP Metrics article cited a Bureau of Labor Statistics report that “negativity in the workplace costs businesses $3 billion a year due to its harmful effects. Workplace negativity is like a disease, and even the best companies aren’t immune.” As unfortunate as this may be, there are two things you need to be mindful of as a leader.

You are responsible for your attitude and perspective.

Here’s a leadership truth you can take to the bank: your attitude will make or break you. Zig Ziglar said, “Your attitude determines your altitude.” How high, how far, and how productive you desire to be is directly linked to your attitude. With a good and healthy attitude and perspective, your potential and possibilities are unlimited.

In 1914, when Thomas Edison’s lab was destroyed by fire. Including one-of-a-kind prototypes and causing $23 million in damage, Edison’s response was simple: “Thank goodness all of our mistakes are burned up. Now we can start fresh again.”

Hang around in leadership long enough, and you will experience the exhilaration of successes and the disappointments of failures. Your attitude in both will give you the perspective you need for the long haul. But remember, your attitude and perspective are directly linked to your success. Choose wisely.

You are responsible for leveraging your influence as much as possible.

You are not personally responsible for the attitudes and perspectives of those around you. While it might undoubtedly improve your workplace culture if you were, it’s something that you have no direct control over.

That being said, you are responsible for leveraging your influence as a leader in a way that others will desire to emulate.

Here’s what I know: your words, your attitude, your perspective, your demeanor, and your tone serve as a thermostat for those around you. When appropriately set, you can positively influence those around you. And while there will perhaps be some who will not choose the positive perspective over the negative one, you can at least take heart in knowing you did your part.

Your perspective and attitude matter, and it’s a choice you must make. Harvey Mackay framed it this way, “When you wake up every day, you have two choices. You can either be positive or negative, an optimist or a pessimist. I choose to be an optimist. It’s all a matter of perspective.”

What choice are you making today?

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The Amazing Power of a Thank You

Posted August 31, 2023August 31, 2023
by admin

No matter what happens in life, be good to people. Being good to people is a wonderful legacy to leave behind. – Taylor Swift

As the father of two now grown and married daughters, I am a Swiftie dad. All through their teenage years our home was filled with the vibes of Taylor Swift.

It was only fitting that they traveled from South Carolina down to Tampa to see her on her Eras Concert tour. I was glad that they finally got to see her in person. It was the ultimate bucket list concert for them.

Her remarkable success speaks for itself. But what truly sets her apart is her tremendous generosity. It was reported in Forbes that she gave out bonuses totaling more than $55 million to her dancers, riggers, sound technicians, catering, and truck drivers. Multiple sources reported that she gave $100,000 bonuses to each of the 50 truck drivers on her tour.

But as impressive (and deserving) as the bonuses were, what I find most impressive is that Swift has held steadfast to the lost and dying art of handwritten notes. In fact, Swift is a prolific note-writer.

A copy of one of the hand-written notes to a truck driver was made public in which she expressed her thanks for their hard work.

Swift has been widely known to send these hand-written notes to friends and fans alike. This makes me wonder, could there be one for this Swiftie dad and his daughters?

In life as in your leadership, expressions of gratitude and thanks are very important.

In fact, survey results published at BlueBoard reported that 2 in 3 (67%) of employed Americans don’t always feel appreciated for their contributions at work. In addition, nearly half (42%) of respondents feel their company lacks a strong culture of appreciation.

In light of this, what does this mean for you as a leader and for your organization to build a culture of appreciation and gratitude? Here are a few thoughts to consider.

Gratitude and appreciation are the foundation of your employee engagement

Much has been said and written here and elsewhere about employee engagement over the years. But little has been said about gratitude and appreciation being the foundation upon which it’s all built and sustained. It’s time we acknowledge it.

Building a culture of appreciation and gratitude begins with those in leadership. Some might be dismissive of this idea as simply being too much of a “soft skill” idea when in reality, it’s needed more now than ever. People will have buy-in with what they help create and when they are appreciated for their efforts and sacrifices.

Gratitude and appreciation are the future of your leadership

The future of your leadership and that of your organization hinges on your understanding of what it means to create and sustain a culture of appreciation.

In the BlueBoard survey, they also reported that a lack of employee appreciation can:

Cause employee disengagement
Impact your employees’ sense of belonging
Erode employee confidence
Trigger job insecurity and anxiety in your workplace

If you want a strong culture of appreciation, strong morale, etc., then you begin with an understanding of the power of ‘thank you’. At every opportunity, make it a practice to show your appreciation and gratitude to those around you. It means more to them than you can imagine. Click To Tweet

As for helping this dad with two daughters, I’d like to express my sincere appreciation to Taylor Swift for making our home a happier place during those middle and high school years. From the boyfriends and the proverbial broken hearts and proms, and eventually on to their weddings, Taylor’s music has been there. Now they are raising up little Swifties of their own.

Thank you, Taylor, for accompanying us on the journey!

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Walking in the Shoes of the People You Lead

Posted August 24, 2023August 24, 2023
by admin

Leadership and learning are indispensable to each other. – John F. Kennedy

Hopefully, you didn’t miss the recent story about Lufthansa CEO Jens Ritter. He took to LinkedIn to share his experience by stepping into the role as an additional crew member on a flight from Frankfurt, Germany to Riyadh, Saudi Arabia.

Ritter, a former pilot himself, joined the crew in serving the passengers aboard the flight. In his post, he said, “Sometimes, you need to change perspectives in order to gain new insights,” he wrote on LinkedIn about his experience. He added, “It was so interesting to address the guests’ wishes individually, to deal with the different energy everyone has.” he said.

Ritter’s example serves as a great lesson for all leaders. It’s one thing to make decisions in your office that will have an impact on your people, but it’s another to walk in their shoes and see for yourself the impact of those decisions. Ritter added, “Deciding things in the office will be different after really feeling the decisions on board.” This is the genius behind what he did and why it’s worth modeling.

As a leader, you make decisions that have consequences beyond the confines of your office. Understanding the impact and consequences of those decisions should never be lost on you. So, what is a leader to do? Let’s start with some basics.

Don’t confuse what’s best for the bottom line with what’s best for your people

As a leader, you have to look out for both. It’s your responsibility to understand the difference between the monetary cost and the morale cost. You can’t win the monetary cost by sacrificing the morale cost. If you lose the morale cost, you will almost inevitably lose the money cost. Click To Tweet

Jens Ritter working with the crew on a Lufthansa flight. — Credit: Jens Ritter via LinkedIn

By placing himself firmly in the shoes of the people impacted by his decisions, Ritter gained a greater appreciation for the impact of his decisions. If you want to be an effective leader, you’ll need to learn to do the same thing.

Your relevance as a leader is proportional to the relationships you build

John Maxwell was right when he said, “People don’t care how much you know until they know how much you care.” And this will always be the secret sauce of your leadership. When you learn the value of relationships as a leader it’s transformative.

You can be a leader by default because you have a title or you can be a leader by inspiration because you have the hearts of your people. I’ll go out on a limb here and say Ritter is an inspirational leader because he understood the value of walking in the shoes of his people. I can assure you that his fellow crew members will never forget the day when their CEO walked in their shoes. If you want to be an effective leader, you’ll need to learn to do the same thing.

You must choose between making a good impression or making a great impact

In leadership, it comes down to this choice you will need to make. Do you want to impress people or do you want to impact people? Far too many are satisfied with simply making a good impression.

Howard Henricks stated, “You can impress people from a distance, but you can only impact up close.” And this is your choice as a leader. Ritter could have stayed in his office and in some small way impressed his people. But up close he impacted them and learned some valuable lessons along the way.

If you want to be an effective leader, you will have to decide whether you want to impress your people or impact them. One choice requires nothing from you while the other will move you from a place of superficiality to significance.

Final Thoughts

Walking in the shoes of your people is one of the greatest and most appreciated things you can do as a leader. It keeps you grounded, relevant, and informed. The greater the distance between you and your people, the greater the gaps are in your leadership. If you haven’t done so lately, take a walk in the shoes of the people you lead.

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Pushing Through Your Frustrations

Posted June 21, 2023June 21, 2023
by admin

Needing to have things perfect is the surest way to immobilize yourself with frustration. – Wayne Dyer

I read a story once about a famous composer who had a rebellious son who would stay out late at night and come home after his father and mother had gone to bed. Before going to his room, he would stop by his father’s piano and slowly and loudly play a simple scale, all but the last note.

Then, leaving the scale uncompleted, he would retire to his room. Meanwhile, the father, hearing the scale minus the final note, would writhe in bed, his mind unable to relax because the scale was unresolved. Finally, in consternation, he would stumble down the stairs and hit the previously unstruck note. Only then, would he be able to return to his bed and go to sleep.

I have to confess that I find the story humorous. If only for a moment I channel my inner prankster, I could find myself doing such a thing.

Here’s what I know, we all have frustrations that we deal with on a regular basis. We all have pet peeves that irritate us.

A story in Forbes magazine revealed the Top 10 pet peeves in the office. They were: gossip and office politics, people taking others’ lunch, inconsiderate co-workers, constant interruptions, loud and annoying ringtones, poorly organized meetings, overcrowded and noisy office spaces, smelly food in the office, inadequate temperature control, and finally, forced birthday celebrations.

Which one(s) do you most identify with?

It’s important to be self-aware and be in touch with your frustrations and how they impact your leadership. Owning what frustrates you is an important first step, but not allowing those frustrations to boil over is equally as important. So here are a few tips for you as a leader to push through your frustrations.

Be at peace with your frustrations

Owning the frustrations is a good first step and can help you be at peace with it. This doesn’t mean that this frustration doesn’t need to be addressed or resolved, but you have to give yourself permission to be frustrated. From there, you can begin seeking solutions to what frustrates you – determine if it can be changed and if not, how your attitude towards it needs to change. But first and foremost, own it and be at peace with what frustrates you.

Own your frustrations

Pushing through your frustrations means that you own it. It means that you do not allow what frustrates you to control you or dictate your attitude or your performance. It means that you take control of the negative emotions that would otherwise derail you. Owning it simply means that you are naming or identifying what is frustrating you and you are committed to pushing through it with a good attitude.

Know what you can and cannot control

Nothing with frustrate you more than trying to push through and change something that frustrates you that you have no control over. For example, if a co-worker has a quirky personality that rubs you the wrong way, chances are you are not going to be able to do much about that. People are wired the way they are wired whether you like it or not. And that truth cuts both ways.

If however, your pet peeve falls into your purview as the leader in your organization and said the co-worker is constantly late for work – which is one of your pet peeves, then yes, you can do something about it.

Nothing will frustrate you more than trying to control what you can’t. Effectively pushing through your frustrations is all about working from this knowledge.

Next Steps: As you reflect on my article this week, consider the following:

What would you identify as your top pet peeve as it relates to you in your workplace?
. What is one thing that you can do today that would help you “own it” – attitude change, etc.?
Is this pet peeve an internal change you are going to have to deal with it, or is it something that you can directly do something about?

Remember – You can be at peace with your frustrations and you do not have to allow them to control you. Is your attitude toward your frustration helping or hurting?

For more information on my coaching services, email me at: [email protected]

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Checking Your Bags

Posted April 14, 2023April 15, 2023
by admin

We all have baggage. The question is: What baggage can you deal with? – Jaime Pressly

I recently took my first trip out of the country since Covid. As a person who loves to travel it was great to once again get the proverbial passport stamp and experience a different culture.

Belize is already hot as it’s summer there. But the trip was great, the water was beautiful, and snorkeling with the stingrays and sharks at Cay Caulker was a thrill.

When it comes to air travel, of course, the more things change, the more they stay the same. I’ve traveled the world, and prefer to travel as lightly as possible. But there comes that time you have to decide whether to check a bag, carry-on only, or both. One way or another, you have to decide what you’re going to do about your bags.

In leadership, as in life, you have to decide what you’re going to do with your baggage. We all have some and how we deal with it makes all the difference.

Here are a few lessons I’ve learned as a traveler and as a leader about carrying baggage. See if you can relate to any of the following.

Only pack the essentials

When traveling, it’s wise to only pack what you need. Keep it to the essentials. The lighter your load the farther and faster you can move. I’ve seen people pack for a week-long trip and you would have thought they were going to be gone for a month.

Leadership Tip: In leadership, excess baggage such as a poor attitude, grudges against a colleague, poor morale, etc. can weigh you and your organization down. In travel, excess baggage will cost you. It will cost you in your leadership as well. To move forward, you will have to have some items in your bags so you’d better be smart about it.

You don’t have to carry other people’s bags

You are not responsible for other people’s baggage. When maneuvering through an airport, you typically have all you can do to keep up with your own bags, much less anyone else’s. And, you never leave your bag unattended.

Leadership Tip: In leadership, you will deal with a variety of people with differing levels of baggage – some good, some not. It’s essential as a leader that you recognize that there will be some people who will try to bring their negative baggage with them into your culture. And once it gets in, it’s hard to get it out. Just as you go through screening at the airport, you have to screen and weed out negative influences and toxic people from within your organization.

Don’t weigh yourself down

We’ve come a long way over the years when it comes to moving about with luggage when traveling. You no longer have to bear the burden of heavy bags and moving about with them – think spinners.

Leadership Tip: In leadership, you want to utilize every tool at your disposal and surround yourself with people who can help move things along. You don’t have to be weighed down by outdated methods and procedures. You can lighten the load for yourself and others by checking your bags carefully and packing in such a way that everyone can benefit.

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Leadership Lessons From a Weary Traveler

Posted February 20, 2023February 20, 2023
by admin

A good traveler has no fixed plans and is not intent on arriving. – Lao Tzu

Some years ago, I was with a group of friends and we were taking a day trip from Athens, Greece up to Delphi – some 115 miles away. We were off to see some of the ancient ruins – including the famed Delhi sanctuary and the Delphi museum.

After enjoying our day in Delphi, the time came to return to Athens. But there was a catch. The weather turned bad and they were experiencing the worse snowstorm they’d had in many years. The route back to Athens would not be the one we would take going back.

We made our way over to the coast and hopped on a ferry that eventually returned us to Athens. What normally would have taken only a couple of hours turned into a long and tiring trip that got us back safely but exhausted.

On a humorous note, while aboard the ferry, some in our group made mention of the need to use the restroom. A smiling deckhand kindly pointed to the sign on a door where the restroom was located. Upon opening the door, the “facilities” was simply a hole in the floor a couple of inches in diameter. Several made the decision to wait until we were back on land.

In your leadership, there will be times when things do not go according to plan. And when this happens, you will have to adjust accordingly. Here are a few things to remember as you face the unexpected.

Flexibility is essential

It’s been said that what doesn’t bend, breaks. And in leadership, you have to anticipate the unexpected, and when it happens you have to be flexible at the moment. John Maxwell observed it this way, “Flexibility says there is more than one answer.” And this is what smart leaders recognize – there is more than one answer to whatever you’re going through.

Your attitude matters

When we left Athens for our day trip over to Delphi, we had no way of knowing that one of the worse snow in decades was going to happen that day. But – snow happens! In leadership, sometimes the unexpected happens. In these moments we are reminded that it’s not what happens to us that matters, it’s how we respond. Your attitude in times of adversity will make you or break you. Choose it wisely.

Adaptability is your ally

One definition says an adaptable leader is “someone who is able to change their behavior in response to changes in a situation.” It’s inevitable that you will face challenges and changes in your leadership. When they come, being adaptable will not only serve you well but can be an invaluable teachable moment for your team to learn from.

Final Thoughts

Just as it was for my trip to Delphi, the road that has brought you to where you are today, may not be the same road to take you to the next level tomorrow. Conditions on the ground may change and you have to learn to be flexible, guard your attitude, and be adaptable.

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The Centrality of Trust in Leadership

Posted November 30, 2022January 13, 2023
by admin

Trust is the lubrication that makes it possible for organizations to work. – Warren Bennis

There is an old story of a father who took his young son out and stood him on the railing of the back porch. He then went down, stood on the lawn, and encouraged the little fellow to jump into his arms. “I’ll catch you,” the father said confidently. After a lot of coaxing, the little boy finally made the leap. When he did, the father stepped back and let the child fall to the ground. He then picked his son up, dusted him off, and dried his tears.

“Let that be a lesson,” he said sternly, “Don’t ever trust anyone.”

While that’s a harsh way to teach a lesson about trust, the foundations of trust – what it is, what it means to be trustworthy, is something that needs to be taught at an early age.

An article in studyfinds.org found that the average American has five people in their life they have a strong relationship with and can lean on for anything. From finding someone who is trustworthy or a good listener to finding someone loyal, nearly three-quarters of respondents to a survey agree that strong partnerships help simplify the complexities of life.

While it may appear, at least on the surface, that most people have at least five people in their circle that they can trust or confide in – is the circle far-reaching enough to include the workplace and other areas critical to the success of a leader?

With trust as the focal point of your leadership, there is the potential for great opportunity and success. While trust does not guarantee this success, one thing is certain, there will never be success without it.

How then does a leader make trust the center point of his or her leadership? What does it look like? Why does it matter? Take these points into consideration.

Trust is an inside job first

In order to be a trusted leader, you first have to be trustworthy. Being trustworthy is an inside job. It’s the bedrock of your character and the needle of your moral compass. Trust is developed over time and is an integral part of your character development. Before you are a trusted leader externally, you first have to develop it on the inside. Click To Tweet

Trust is a validation

It’s commonly said that trust has to be earned. And while that is true in many respects, I see trust more as a validation that it’s been seen and observed over time, and has been recognized as a reliable character trait of the leader. When your trust has been validated by the people you lead, you now have the opportunity to lead them with a greater purpose.

Trust is verifiable

Making trust the central point in your leadership also makes it verifiable. Trust is validated not by your words but by your actions. As a leader, this is crucial. Nothing will cause your people to lose confidence in your leadership more than being unreliable and creating uncertainty in their minds about your ability to deliver on what you say. If trust is a validation of your leadership, it’s verified by your daily decisions and actions.

Trust is fragile

While no leader in good faith sets out to purposefully violate his or her trust, it must be handled with care. No leader is perfect and even the best mess up. Unrealistic expectations can be hard to manage, and trust is not exclusive to only the leader. Trust is a two-way street that all must be striving for and protect. The expectation of trust in the leader ought to be the standard for all. Click To Tweet

Final Thoughts

“Character makes trust possible, and trust is the foundation of leadership,” says John Maxwell. I agree. Trust is the glue that holds it all together and as a leader, it must take center stage in your leadership.

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How Anxiety Impacts Your Leadership – Part Two: Stay Calm

Posted September 19, 2022September 20, 2022
by admin

Anxiety does not empty tomorrow of its sorrows, but only empties today of its strength. -Charles Spurgeon

In Part One of How Anxiety Impacts Your Leadership, I shared a story from the book by Tod Bolsinger entitled Canoeing the Mountains. In the book he shared the story of how when a herd of impala in the brutal African heat find a watering hole they rush to drink, crowding in, fearful of not getting enough water to sustain them. Suddenly, one impala raises his head on high alert. Immediately every other impala stops drinking and stands at attention. At that moment, every impala has a life-or-death decision: Is this a lion or not?

If there is a lion lurking near that spot and they don’t run, they become lion lunch. If there’s no lion lurking near the hole and they do run, they lose their place at the watering hole and could die of thirst.

If there is a lion and they run, or if there is no lion and they don’t run, they live another day. But all that matters is: Is that a lion or not? Everything in their impala being is focused on making that crucial life-and-death decision. Just like they do every day. Numerous times a day.

Part of what helps the impala make that decision is the herd energy, the animal anxiety that permeates the group and causes them to share listening, hearing, and deciding together. The key takeaway from part one is found in how the impala has to make this split-second decision of determining whether the threat is a lion or not. And translating that into leadership, are we making decisions based on fear or facts and whether the threats we sense are real or made up? These are critical decisions that have to be made and it’s important to your leadership and your team to get it right.

In our high-anxiety moments as leaders, much is riding on the decision-making process we engage in. As leaders, what are the one or two things that you can do to instill confidence and clarity in the moment? Here in part two, let me offer up a few suggestions.

Stay calm

We’ve heard this statement so much that sometimes I wonder if its true effect of it is lost on us. So what does stay calm really mean for you and me as leaders? Bolsinger defines it this way: “To stay calm is to be so aware of yourself that your response to the situation is not to the anxiety to the people around you but to the actual issue at hand.” And it’s when you are leading on this level that you know you are effective. When your actions as a leader do not raise or contribute to the level of anxiety of those around you, then you know you have a calming effect as a leader.

As a leader, you don’t want to make threats- whether real or perceived- any worse. You want to be able to lead your people with a steady hand and laser-like focus. This can only happen when you are calm on the inside and out.

Make better decisions

An obvious by-product of staying calm is your ability to make better decisions. Bolsigner’s perspective is: “For leaders, the point of calming down is not to feel better; it’s to make better decisions. It’s to make the best decisions for furthering the mission. When people are too hot, they don’t.”

And this is the point we have to remember; anxiety leads to poor decision-making. Whether that’s coming from the people you lead or you as the leader, it can derail the mission because bad decisions were made. Making good decisions is not about being lucky. It’s a result of smart intuitive leadership instincts developed over time and experience. Click To Tweet

Final Thoughts

In one way or another, anxiety is going to impact your leadership. When it does, you can channel that energy into something positive, lead from a place of calm and inner strength, make better decisions, and lead your team forward.

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Focus On Choices, Not Conditions

Posted August 22, 2022August 22, 2022
by admin

May your choices reflect your hopes, not your fears. – Nelson Mandela

“When I was a young boy, my father, a baker, introduced me to the wonders of song,” tenor Luciano Pavarotti relates. “He urged me to work hard to develop my voice. Arrigo Pola, a professional tenor in my hometown of Modena, Italy, took me as a pupil. I also enrolled in a teacher’s college. On graduating, I asked my father, ‘Shall I be a teacher or a singer?’ “Luciano,’ my father replied, ‘If you try to sit on two chairs, you will fall between them. For life, you must choose one chair.’

“I chose one. It took seven years of study and frustration before I made my first professional appearance, and it took another seven to reach the Metropolitan Opera. And now I think whether it’s laying bricks, writing a book-whatever we choose- we should give ourselves to it. Commitment, that’s the key. Choose one chair.”

The lesson from Pavorotti is timeless. In life as in leadership, we must be focused and choose our one chair wisely.

The most common problem that many of us have when things go wrong is that we tend to focus on the wrong thing. By nature, we tend to look at the conditions around us. And the more we focus on the conditions around us – the problems and the circumstances, we lose focus on what matters most in those moments – choices.

When we are focused on the conditions around us, we tend to be reactionary. When we focus on choices, we tend to think in terms of values. Click To Tweet It’s when you respond to conditions on the ground through the lens of your values that you demonstrate your leadership skill.

In your leadership, you will regularly face the decision to focus on choices or conditions. John Maxwell put it this way, “Those who focus on the external expect conditions to determine whether they keep their commitments. Because conditions are so transitory, their commitment level changes like the wind.”

In contrast, Maxwell adds, “People who base their actions on the internal usually focus on the choices. Each choice is a crossroad, one that will either confirm or compromise their commitments.” And he identifies three ways to recognize when you come to that crossroad.

A personal decision is required

When you come to your crossroad, you will have to make a personal decision as a leader. Every leader does. And at this moment you must choose to make it based on commitments or conditions.

Know this: Conditions change but commitments remain. Your leadership will ultimately be defined by the choices you make.

The decision will likely cost you something

Every crossroad and every decision carries with it a cost. You will pay a price for your commitments and you will pay a price for your comforts. One is about your short-term benefit, the other is the long game. Click To Tweet

Know this: Each choice you make is a reflection of the maturity of your leadership.

Others will likely be influenced by it

There’s no question that every choice you make will influence others. As a leader, there’s no way around it. With this in mind, think in terms of not what is best for you but how your choice will impact those around you. Every choice has a consequence and every choice is an opportunity to add value to those around you.

Know this: Each choice you make is a reflection of your influence and ultimately your legacy.

Final Thoughts

Choices or conditions. Every day you will be confronted with them. Where’s your focus? Are you consumed with the problem or are you leading with choices that provide solutions? This is not a new thing to leadership, but if you’re new to leadership, you will need to get this figured out. Choose wisely.

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