Doubts – Doug Dickerson on Leadership

The only limit to our realization of tomorrow will be our doubts of today. – Franklin D. Roosevelt

Word study

Verb

To be uncertain about; consider questionable or unlikely; hesitate to believe
To distrust
Archaic. To fear; be apprehensive about

Source: Dictionary.com

A word about doubts

Doubts. It’s a confession that many leaders are not willing to own up to. But if you hang around in leadership for any length of time you will have your fill of doubts. I know I have.

I am reminded of a story from Bits & Pieces some years ago about Lord Halifax, a former foreign secretary of Great Britain, once shared a railway compartment with two prim-looking spinsters. A few moments before reaching his destination the train passed through a tunnel. In the utter darkness, Halifax kissed the back of his hand noisily several times. When the train drew into the station, he rose, lifted his hat, and in a gentlemanly way said:

“May I thank whichever one of you two ladies I am indebted to for the charming incident in the tunnel.” He then beat a hasty retreat, leaving the two ladies glaring at each other.

That amusing little story subtly reminds us that our own self-doubts have a way of glaring back at us from time to time. But what tends to be the source of our doubts? There are perhaps numerous reasons why we tend to have our doubts as it pertains to our personal leadership and confidences we should have. But here are three common ones.

We have doubts when we listen to our critics

If we spend too much time entertaining the voices of our critics we can unwittingly position ourselves for disappointment. This happens not because the critic is right but because we allow those opposing voices to linger.

Mindset author Carole S. Dweck said, “Why waste time proving over and over how great you are, when you could be getting better?”. It’s when you change your mindset that you erase the doubts of your critics and most important – yourself.

We have doubts when we have the wrong attitude

The day you own our attitude is the day you begin to tear down the destructive force of your doubts. Zig Ziglar was right when he said. “Your attitude, not your aptitude, determines your altitude.” You can’t expect to grow as a leader and reach your full potential so long as negative attitudes fill your mind.

Take a moment, right now, for some intentional reflection. If your current attitude/mindset was set like a thermostat for the rest of the year, do you think you could confidently look back a year from now and believe in your heart that you would be better off at that time? How do you think your attitude impacts those around you? What needs to change?

We have doubts that serve a greater purpose

We have to be ever-mindful and vigilant about the messages and voices we entertain and the mindset we develop. It’s an intuition skill that we develop over time.

But not every doubt serves a negative purpose and not every critic is wrong. This is where, as leaders, we must listen with a discerning ear.

As a leader, don’t mistake constructive criticism from a friend or peer as a critic out to harm you. Trusted confidants who are able to speak truth into your life are essential to your leadership growth. How you receive the truth along with how you apply it, will make all the difference to you going forward.

Not every doubt is your enemy; not every praise your friend. As a leader, you must know the difference.

Doubt quotes

“Your goals, minus your doubts, equal your reality”. – Ralph Marston

“Face your fears and doubts, and new worlds open to you”. – Robert Kiyosaki

“I think you’re not a human being unless you have doubts and fears.” – Mike Krzyzewski

“Never interrupt someone doing what you said couldn’t be done.” – Amelia Earhart

A final word

If you have doubts as a leader from time to time welcome to the club. We all do. Never allow your doubts to get in the way of your destiny. You are stronger than you think. You are not the sum of your fears. Turn your doubts into stepping stones on your way to achieving your dreams and fulfilling your destiny.

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If you are a leader, you should never forget that everyone needs encouragement. And everyone who receives it- young or old, successful or less-than-successful, unknown or famous- is changed by it. – John Maxwell

A story is told of American painter, John Sargent, who once painted a panel of roses that was highly praised by his critics. It was a small picture, but it approached perfection.

Although offered a high price for it on many occasions, Sargent refused to sell it. He considered it his best work and was very proud of it. Whenever he was deeply discouraged and doubtful of his abilities as an artist, he would look at it and remind himself, “I painted that.” Then his confidence and ability would come back to him.

In all of my years in leadership, I have yet to find a leader who didn’t want, need, or appreciate a little encouragement. I believe it’s a universal need and one not just exclusive to leaders. Regardless of your walk in life, who doesn’t appreciate some encouragement along the way?

The above story is a reminder to us of some simple truths about leadership. Let me share three with you.

Every leader has value

John Sargent is considered to be the leading portrait painter of his generation. His mark on the world was made through the arts.

Your gifts or talents may not revolve around being a distinguished artist, but your value exists in other areas. Perhaps you have organizational gifts that keep your business running smooth. You might be the visionary that causes people to see the big picture which creates the necessary momentum to plan for the future. You might be the change agent who speaks the truth about what needs to happen for the sake of your future. (I wrote about how you can add value to your respective organizations here.)

The point here is this: You are a person of value not because of what you do but because of who you are. Your value is more than what you contribute to the bottom line.

Every leader has doubts

Despite his acclaim as an artist, John Sargent still had seasons of discouragement and moments when he called his own abilities into question. Sound familiar?

At some point in time, I think every leader experiences the same struggle. I have. (I wrote about facing your doubts and fears here). We look at heroes in our respective fields of expertise and we say, “If I can only be successful like them, then I will have it made,” not realizing they most likely had the same struggle.

We unfairly compare ourselves to others and think that because we haven’t reached the same level of fame or success then we are a failure – not realizing it may have taken them decades to get there and we want to be there in a fraction of the time. It’s unrealistic and self-defeating. And in the end, discouragement sets in.

The point here is this: You are not the sum of your doubts and fears. And your growth and development as a leader is not a 50-yard dash, it’s a marathon.

Every leader has a sweet spot

John Sargent held on to the prized painting as a reminder of his talents. In moments of self-doubt and discouragement, it motivated him to keep going.

The sweet spot in your leadership comes when you realize that you are not as great as the headlines you write yourself. You are not as bad as the headlines your enemies or critics write. Joy in leadership comes when you discover your why, find fulfillment in the moment, and live for something greater than yourself. (I wrote about finding your purpose in leadership here).

For Sargent, his sweet spot moment came when his focus was on his best work, not his worse. Train yourself to look at the positive. Don’t allow the negative things to define you.

The point here is this: How you rise above self-doubt and discouragement begins with how you see yourself.

Have you found your sweet spot?

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Doug Dickerson on Leadership

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