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Are You a Leader With an Identity Crisis?

identity

Getting in touch with your real self must be your first priority. – Tom Hopkins

A story is told of the renowned artist Paul Gustave Dore who lost his passport while traveling in Europe. When he came to a border crossing, he explained his predicament to one of the guards. Giving his name to the official, Dore hoped he would be recognized and allowed to pass.

The guard, however, said that many people attempted to cross the border by claiming to be persons they were not. Dore insisted that he was the man he claimed to be. “All right,” said the official, “we’ll give you a test, and if you pass it we’ll allow you to go through.” Handing him a pencil and a sheet of paper, he told the artist to sketch several peasants standing nearby. Dore did it so quickly and skillfully that the guard was convinced he was indeed who he claimed to be. His work confirmed his word.

It cannot be overstated how important your identity is as a leader. If you have a false sense of identity it will create a void in your leadership that will hurt you. Understanding your identity is Leadership 101 but if you don’t get this you will pay a price.

Are you a leader with an identity crisis? Here are three ways to find out.

You rely on your title instead of your values

This is a common mistake with new leaders. Leaders who do this tend to overplay their hand because they think their title or position carries enough clout to lead. This approach is an identity crisis waiting to happen. Here’ why.

When your values and character take a back seat to a title or position then it’s likely that you will wash out at some point. In, The 5 Levels of Leadership, John Maxwell states, “Your values are the soul of your leadership and they drive your behavior.” And this is the crux of your identity. Better to hold tight to your values than try to muscle your way to the top without them.

Key takeaway: In the end, what defines you as a leader is not your title or position; it’s your character and values. Whenever you confuse the two you are having an identity crisis.

You rely on rules instead of relationships

Leaders who rely squarely on their title as a means to enforce their rules tend to miss the big picture about relationships. Its been said that rules without relationships breeds rebellion. And when you are more concerned about dictating rules and regulations than you are about building relationships then you are a leader with an identity crisis. Here’s why this matters.

People tend to follow leaders they like and respect. If your people only see you as the office Sherriff and not someone they can relate to on a personal level then you are depreciating your potential as a leader. At the end of the day your people want a leader they can relate to not one that they fear.

Key takeaway: When you are heavy on relationships you can be light on the rules.  Now you can devote your time and energy to what matters most – your people and your shared success.

You rely on receiving instead of giving

The magnitude and duration of your identity crisis in leadership is contingent upon learning these basic tenants. In short; it’s not about you. The depth, length, and reach of your leadership will never be measured by what you receive but by what you give. Here’s why it matters.

Leaders are givers. True leadership is about reproducing and raising up more leaders – not more followers. When this truth comes to light it creates a paradigm shift in your thinking, your actions, and your motives. J. Donald Walters expressed it this way, “Leadership is an opportunity to serve. It is not a trumpet call to self-importance.” Do the math: Creating more followers is about addition. Creating more leaders is about multiplication.

Key takeaway: Be generous. Don’t measure your success as a leader by accolades or plaques, but by how you invested your time, talents, and treasure in the lives of those you served.

What do you say?

 

© 2015 Doug Dickerson

 

 

 

The Two Faces of Conflict

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The harder the conflict, the more glorious the triumph. – Thomas Paine

A story is told of two men who lived in a small village that got into a terrible dispute. They could not resolve it so they decided to talk to the town sage. The first man went to the sage’s home and told his version of what happened. When he finished, the sage said, “You’re absolutely right.” The next night, the second man called on the sage and told his side of the story. The sage responded, “You’re absolutely right.” Afterward, the sage’s wife scolded her husband. “Those men told you two different stories and you told them they were absolutely right. That’s impossible, they can’t both be absolutely right.” The sage turned to his wife and said, “You’re absolutely right.”

Leaders know a thing or two about conflict. And most don’t like it. But conflict or “storming” as I once heard it described, can be beneficial if handled the right way. Much of what you hear in leadership or management circles focuses on conflict “resolution” which is based largely off the belief that conflict is always harmful. But is it? Can an organization embrace a healthy form of conflict that works for the organization in a positive way? I believe so. Here are two key lessons about conflict and their characteristics that you need to know.

The conflict that divides us

There is no denying that unresolved conflict can be very detrimental to an organization.  But a greater question needs to be addressed. Do you want the conflict to go away as quick as possible because it makes you uncomfortable or do you want to get to the root of the problem? A Band-Aid approach will not help you in the long run. What are some of the characteristics of the conflict that divides us? Here are a few:

  1. Clashing values. One of the most significant causes of conflict that divides organizations happens over clashing values. When values are not clear, not embraced, or are compromised then the end result will be unhealthy conflict.
  2. Personal agendas. If the people within your organization place their personal agendas over the mission of the organization then conflict that divides will exist. If your people are score-keepers and are only interested in what’s in it for them then perpetual conflict will ruin your organization.
  3. Lack of trust. Most conflict that divides any organization at its root is a trust issue. If team members do not feel they can trust each other- or their leader, then conflict is inevitable. Conflict is the language of lost trust.

The conflict that unites us

As already mentioned, I do not believe all conflict is harmful. If we do not understand the source of conflict that divides us we will have a hard time understanding conflict that can unite us. So how do we make the connection and rally around conflict or ‘storming’ that can bring us together? Here are a few ways:

  1. Mutual trust and respect. It all comes back to trust. If conflict that divides is the language of lost trust then mutual trust and respect is the language that unites us. Values must be clear, mutual, and fully subscribed to in order to move forward as a unified team. Honesty is the key word for conflict that unites.
  2. A focus on what’s best for the team. When personal agendas are set aside for what is best for the organization then every ‘storming’ session is about what’s best for all of us rather than just one. The airing out of ideas then becomes team focused which creates an atmosphere where, because of trust, a free-flow of best ideas can be voiced and no one is threatened. Differences of opinion or approach are now welcomed because no one is questioning motives. It can breathe new life into your organization and creativity can flourish.
  3. Principled leadership. “Everything rises and falls on leadership,” says John Maxwell. It is incumbent upon leaders to position their organizations in a way that fosters healthy conflict by means of mutual trust and respect and open communication. Values must be clear and everyone must be engaged.

Healthy conflict can thrive within your organization but it won’t happen unless there is a principled leader in place who understands the difference. Not all conflict is harmful and not all of it is helpful, but hopefully now you have a better understanding of the two.

What do you say?

© 2015 Doug Dickerson

 

Turning Your Stress into Success

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When the pressure is on, great leaders are at their best. Whatever is inside them comes to the surface. – John Maxwell

A story is told of actress Carol Burnett who got out of a cab one day and caught her coat in the door. The driver was unaware of her plight and slowly began to edge out into traffic. To keep from being pulled off her feet, the comedienne had to run alongside down the block.

A passerby noted her predicament and quickly alerted the driver. He stopped, jumped out, and released Miss Burnett’s coat. “Are you all right?” he asked anxiously. “Yes,” she gasped, “but how much more do I owe you?”

That light-hearted story shows a humorous way of responding to what could have been a not-so-funny outcome. In our world as leaders we can find ourselves in stressful situations. How it’s handled matters.

It’s not a secret that the stress in the workplace is on the rise. In a recent study by Nielsen (http://bit.ly/1CUMamt), 80% of U.S. workers said they can identify at least one thing that stresses them at work. The stress factors include low salaries, intense workloads, and taxing commutes to name a few.

Great leaders are those who, when under pressure, step up and deliver in spite of the stress. Of course this is easier said than done. So what should a leader do when he or she is in the pressure cooker? Here are three approaches.

Put your stress into context

At times we can be our own worst enemy when it comes to the stress. For instance; we procrastinate on an important deadline and are now scrambling to complete at the last minute. We allow our imaginations to run wild with scenarios we create that adds fuel to the fire. Your workload is doubled without warning and there’s no extra help. We speculate in “what if’s” and get worked up over hypotheticals. It all adds up to one thing: stress! Can you relate?

The best thing you can do as a leader is to put your stress in context. You may be overwhelmed or feel that your current “crisis” is about to sink you. Allow me to make a suggestion – take a step back and take a deep breath. Look at the big picture. It may not be as big a deal as you think. If it is…keep reading.

Get a game plan

Establishing context about your stress is essential. A game plan is a way out. Here is a simple formula to help you get your game plan ready: W (What I am stressed about?) +W (why I am stressed?)+W (What can I do about it?) = S (Success). Get some paper and begin to work on your plan. Here’s how.

First, identify your stress. Is it a personnel issue? Is there a breakdown in organizational structure or communication? Is it a personal issue? How is this stress impacting your ability to lead? Regardless of where it takes you, figure it out. Second, now that you know what it is, you need to figure out why it is stressing you. What are the immediate consequences of your stress? Is this stress an imminent threat to your organization or personal life? Etc…  Finally, write out what you can do about it. What are the top two or three action steps you can implement immediately that can help? Is there someone who can help you? Do they need to?  Keep in mind, there may not be anything you or anyone else can do about it. In such case, you have to change your attitude toward it. Now that you have a plan – work it!

Apply your lessons

Smart leaders are out-front leaders. You will never avoid stress as a leader so learning how to deal with it will make a world of difference. Smart leaders know how to manage their stress and the negative impacts it can make across the spectrum of your organization.

Every stressful situation is a test and whether you pass or fail depends on your approach. Not all stress is self-inflicted, and not all reactions merit the same response. Smart leaders apply the lessons and learn from it.

Success over stress is all about your context, your game plan, and your attitude. Choose wisely!

 

© 2015 Doug Dickerson

 

 

 

Leadership By The Numbers

LeadershipByTheNumbers

Leadership By The Numbers is my new book release exclusively with Amazon Kindle Direct Publishing!

In Leadership By The Numbers you will learn ten powerful leadership lessons to help you grow as a more effective leader. Do you know how to handle your critics? What are the some of the most important habits of kind leaders? How do you map your future as a leader? In this new release I share my insights and answer these questions and more!

In Leadership By The Numbers it all adds up to one thing – adding value and helping you grow as a leader.

You can download the book now at Amazon for just $3.99! Click on the link and make your purchase today!

Order here:   http://www.amazon.com/dp/B00SQMLHTC

 

* This post has been re-sent to you due to a link connection issue that has now been resolved. Thank you!

Five Routines for Growing Leaders

Composite of Clock and Calendar

There is comfort in rituals, and rituals provide a framework for stability when you are trying to find answers. – Deborah Norville

I came across a fascinating article in Business Insider (http://read.bi/155XpL3) about the daily routines of 16 famous creative people. The article featured the likes of Ludwig van Beethoven, Thomas Mann, Sigmund Freud, Maya Angelou, and Victor Hugo to name a few.

What were some of the more peculiar routines? Beethoven’s day began with breakfast which consisted of coffee which he prepared himself. He determined that there should be 60 beans per cup, and he often counted them out one by one for a precise dose.

Victor Hugo would start the day by taking a public ice bath. Charles Darwin’s focused work would be interrupted by occasional trips to the snuff jar. Honore´ de Balzac would spend a large majority of his day writing with the help of upwards to 50 cups of black coffee.

Insights into the routines of these creative people prompted me to think about the necessary disciplines for growing leaders. Your growth as a leader is not a passive and disengaged process. Not if you want to grow.

Over the years I have found routines that have worked for me. It has little to do with whether you are a morning person or a night person, a social butterfly or prefer to be alone. What is the tipping point? The disciplines you develop today will determine the type of leader you will become tomorrow. Here are five routines – leadership vitamins if you will, that will help you grow into a healthy leader.

The routine of reading

Leaders are readers. Fortunately, I come from a long line of readers and writers. It was in those formative years, and despite my struggles with dyslexia, where I formed a love for reading that stuck. If you want to grow as a leader there is no better way or place to start than with a good book. When reading is a priority then your leadership growth will be automatic.

The routine of listening

The older I get the more I realize just how much I don’t know. I’ve discovered that there is no better way to learn than to be an engaged and active listener. In many circles you will find active and engaged talkers, and there is a time and a place to talk, but for the leader who wants to grow, he or she will listen more and talk less.

The routine of reflection

Growing leaders take the time to reflect. Through the course of each day you come across dozens of people, make important decisions, and often it’s done on the spur of the moment. Reflection time affords you the chance to measure your progress. Don’t know where to start? At the end of the day try answering these questions: Where did I add value today? How was my attitude? Who needs my encouragement? Etc…  Reflection can also include prayer and meditation to replenish the soul.

The routine of exercise

I’ve touched on this before but it’s worth repeating. Healthy leaders are productive leaders. Exercise should be an integral part of your daily agenda as a leader. It’s good for your body and mind and it gets your creative juices flowing. Include in this routine healthier eating habits. A proper diet and exercise are the fuels you need to grow as a leader.

The routine of staying connected

Growing leaders are connected leaders. It’s through the growth and development of your personal and professional relationships that you mature. Being connected gives you a sense of community but it also runs deeper. It’s when you are able to let your guard down, take your mask off and be vulnerable, that you can truly see growth as a leader. Are you a detached leader? If so, then get connected- your growth depends on it.

What are you your leadership routines?

 

© 2015 Doug Dickerson

Six Threats Every Leader Will Face

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Strong convictions precede great actions. – James Freeman Clarke

The legendary bare-knuckles boxing champion John L. Sullivan was confronted by a runt of a man who, suffering from the effects of too much drink, challenged the burly champion to a fight. Sullivan, who once battled toe-to-toe with an opponent for 75 rounds, growled, “Listen, you, if you hit me just once — and I find out about it …” The Champ didn’t need to finish the sentence!

Hang around in leadership long enough and you will have your share of challenges and threats. While they may not be physical in nature, threats to your leadership and how you handle them is important. Some threats are obvious while others can seem rather innocent. If left unchecked they can threaten your effectiveness going forward.

Identifying the threats to your leadership is helpful if you are going to succeed. Here are six common ones. Which one is the most pressing to you?

The threat against your values.

Your values and character are the cornerstones of your leadership. Threats against your character will come and how you deal with it will make you or break you. Don’t take threats to your values lightly. Be diligent and accountable. Make sure that your values are clear and non-negotiable.

The threat against your time.

One of the largest challenges you will face as a leader is time management. If you are not intentional about the priorities of your day or take ownership of your time then someone else will. If something is a priority to you then it should be a priority in your schedule. From family, children, work, deadlines, meetings, etc…set your pace, set your priorities, and stick to it.

The threat against your expectations.

Expectations fuel your dreams and goals. Threats to your expectations surface when people see the obstacles and not the opportunities. Threats to your leadership occur when people opt for what’s safe instead of what’s hard. Bring these people up to your level of expectations if you can but never retreat.

The threat against your personal growth and development.

If you are not growing as a leader you are in decline as a leader. Personal growth and development is fundamental to good leadership. When you commit to grow and develop it will expand your horizons and will open up a whole new arena of possibilities. Never stop growing.

The threat against your health.

Leaders are busy and are often under a great deal of stress. Don’t allow the responsibilities of your leadership to cause you to neglect your health. A healthy diet with exercise is important not only to your physical health but it will keep you refreshed mentally and emotionally. In addition, your spiritual health is not one to neglect either. When you can tap in to the inspiration that your faith provides it can replenish your heart and mind. Healthy leaders are productive leaders.

The threat against yourself.

Sometimes we are our own worst enemies. Often it’s not the jerk down the hall that’s my greatest threat- it’s the one in the mirror. When my body is tired and my attitude stinks then the potential to make a mess of things is magnified. Can you relate? As you work on the fundamentals of your leadership remember that first and foremost it’s an inside job. Before you can lead others you must learn to lead yourself.

What do you say?

 

© 2015 Doug Dickerson

* I welcome your feedback! Obviously this is not an exhaustive list. What would you add to the list? Which one of the above do you struggle with the most? 

 

4 Traits of Selfless Leaders

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It’s difficult to find common ground with others when the only person you’re focused on is yourself. – John Maxwell

You may have heard the story of two friends who met for dinner in a restaurant. Each requested filet of sole. After a few minutes the waiter came back with their order. Two pieces of fish, one large and one small, were on the same platter. One of the men proceeded to serve his friend. Placing the small piece on a plate, he handed it across the table.

“Well, you certainly do have nerve!” exclaimed his friend. ”

“What’s troubling you?” asked the other. “Look what you’ve done,” he answered. “You’ve given me the little piece and kept the big one for yourself.” “How would you have done it?” the man asked. His friend replied, “If I were serving, I would have given you the big piece.” “Well,” replied the man, “I’ve got it, haven’t I?” At this, they both laughed.

One leader’s self-confidence is another leader’s arrogance in the world of perceptions. So let’s put the cards on the table up front- many leaders struggle with acts of selfishness. We want the big piece of fish. It’s not a truth to take pride in but one in which we have to acknowledge if we are going to grow and mature as a leader. In my own leadership journey the biggest mistakes I’ve made along the way can be traced back to selfish acts.

Growing to this new level in your leadership is about overcoming your fears, insecurities, and misconceptions about what it means to lead in a selfless manner. Here are four traits of selfless leaders and why they matter.

Selfless leaders empower their people

The emergence of a selfless leadership style begins by embracing this fundamental principle: until you empower your people they are only spectators. When they are empowered they can produce, achieve, and succeed. Unless you mature in this area as a leader you will never  grow to your full potential.

Why does this matter? It matters because in any successful organization it’s empowered team members who run with the vision, fulfill its mission, and achieve its goals. Selfless leaders make it possible not by promoting themselves but by promoting others.

Selfless leaders share the credit

Billy Hornsby once observed, “It’s okay to let those you lead outshine you, for if they shine brightly enough, they will reflect positively on you.” The powerful wisdom of that statement must not be lost on the reality that selfish leaders struggle in this area.

A selfish leader wants to take all of the credit- often at the expense of work others did, and boast “look at what I did.”

Why does this matter? A selfless leader will concede being in the spotlight by putting someone else in it. It matters because each individual who had skin in the game and gave it their all deserve credit. A selfless leader will gladly say, “Look at what we did!”

Selfless leaders initiate the conversation

The mark of maturity in a leader begins to take shape when he or she invites open and honest conversation instead of dodging it. Selfish leaders seek to control the message, the agenda, and in the end stifle creativity and deprive themselves of much needed feedback. If a leader’s head is buried in the sand the view for everyone else is not that pleasant. Instead, a selfless leader engages in conversation with his or her people and makes it a priority.

Why does this matter? A selfless leader understands that open communication is the life-blood of the organization. Disconnected people create disconnected organizations. Selfless leaders build bridges and get people talking because your survival depends on it.

Selfless leaders create the culture

Leaders, whether selfish or selfless, set the tone and create the organizational atmosphere. Through your growth and maturity as a leader you’ve come to understand that people buy in to your actions and attitudes before they embrace your vision. Better to be rejected as a leader because people did not embrace your vision than because they did not embrace your selfish leadership style.

Why does this matter? Selfless leaders understand that value is created where value is given. Selfless leaders know that when they help others succeed they succeed. It matters because when this is the underlying foundation of your organizational structure it creates an atmosphere where everybody wins, not just a few.

What do you say?

 

© 2015 Doug Dickerson

Six Leadership Lessons from Winston Churchill

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The greatest lesson in life is to know that even fools are right sometimes –Winston Churchill

As a student of leadership I have much respect for Winston Churchill. As a student of history I have an even greater appreciation for his leadership skills in a most turbulent time in world history. His strength and resolve during World War II gave the British people hope in their darkest hours. His courage and sense of purpose was the driving force that ultimately led the Allies to victory.

Step back in time with me and let Churchill’s own words teach us some time-tested leadership lessons that are applicable today. Here are six of my favorites.

Success is not final, failure is not fatal: it is the courage to continue that counts.

If you are going to last as a leader you have to let this truth resonate down deep. Every leader experiences failure. But failure does not define you- it shapes you. Failure is merely an event that happens on the road to success. What matters is not that you failed or even tasted the joy of success, but that you had the courage to continue.

We make a living by what we get, but we make a life by what we give.

This is such a valuable lesson to learn as a leader. Many have made the mistake of buying in to the old notion that the one with the most toys wins. But true leadership is not about what you get but rather about what you give. The world will be a little better than you found it when you come to discover the joy of giving.

You have enemies? Good. That means you’ve stood up for something, sometime in your life.

Churchill was greatly admired but he also had plenty of enemies. While the consequences may not be as significant as what Churchill faced, you too, will have your share of critics. But regardless of the challenges that you face and the enemies who would seek to harm you; hold true to your principles and hold true to your convictions. Stand up for what is right and do good by all men.

Attitude is a little thing that makes a big difference.

In the face of overwhelming odds and at times great calamity Churchill held on to what I would label his trump card. It’s what would give him the courage to move forward in the darkest hours of the war and is what would give his countrymen hope. Succinctly and truthfully put – Churchill’s attitude was a life saver. Never underestimate the power of a positive attitude. As a leader is will make you or break you.

I am an optimist. It does not seem too much use being anything else.

As a leader you choose your attitude and you choose your state of mind. If there was ever a leader who could have chosen a different path and projected a totally different outlook it was Churchill. With the relentless bombing raids on London; the tremendous loss of life coupled with all of the suffering that took place, Churchill could have fallen victim to despair. But his optimism would one day lead to victory. I don’t know the challenges you face today but I do know this much – being optimistic is a choice that will put you on the right path.

Lady Astor: “Winston, if I were your wife I’d put poison in your coffee.” Winston Churchill: “Nancy, if I were your husband I’d drink it.”

Humor was one of Churchill’s endearing qualities. His quick wit and sense of humor was a reflection of the total man who took his work seriously but knew the importance of enjoying a light moment. His humor was as much an integral part of his leadership style as any other trait. Your life in leadership will be marked by important decisions and things that will define your legacy. Churchill reminds us that having a sense of humor makes it all bearable. So remember this important principle in your leadership – it’s okay to smile, laugh, and enjoy the journey.

What do you say?

 

© 2015 Doug Dickerson

 

Put on Your “Yes Face” in 2015

teamwork

Perpetual optimism is a force multiplier. – Colin Powell

During his days as president, Thomas Jefferson and a group of companions were traveling across the country on horseback. They came to a river which had left its banks because of a recent downpour. The swollen river had washed the bridge away. Each rider was forced to ford the river on horseback, fighting for his life against the rapid currents. The very real possibility of death threatened each rider, which caused a traveler who was not part of their group to step aside and watch. After several had plunged in and made it to the other side, the stranger asked President Jefferson if he would ferry him across the river. The president agreed without hesitation. The man climbed on, and shortly thereafter the two of them made it safely to the other side.

As the stranger slid off the back of the saddle onto dry ground, one in the group asked him, “Tell me, why did you select the president to ask this favor of?”

The man was shocked, admitting he had no idea it was the president who had helped him. “All I know,” he said, “Is that on some of your faces was written the answer ‘No,’ and on some of them was the answer ‘yes.’ His was a ‘Yes’ face.”

Whether or not you wear a “yes face” is a choice you make each day. Along with it are the consequences of that choice. As we enter into a new year let’s explore a few ways in which a “yes face” can be a difference maker in 2015. Here are four ways.

Say yes to a new attitude

Your attitude is the deal breaker of all deal breakers. 2015 will be no different for you if you do not learn to master your attitude.

As a leader your attitude is contagious and sets the tone for your leadership style and effectiveness. John Maxwell was right when he said, “People may hear your words, but they feel your attitude.” In 2015 say yes to a renewed attitude that is positive and empowering.

Say yes to new realities

Each New Year brings a new set of realities. Are you where you thought you’d be? Perhaps not.  But 2015 is your year to embrace a new attitude and to right the course. Don’t be discouraged about where you are – it’s only temporary. It’s your starting point.

It’s now time for some honest appraisals of where you are in order to chart the course to where you want to go. Don’t turn a blind eye to your current realities. See them for what they are – benchmarks to where you want to be by the end of 2015.

Say yes to new successes

As you embrace a new attitude and new realities you can then move forward with a new game plan to achieve new successes. 2015 may be your year to bring on that coach you’ve been thinking about. It could be time to join up in a Master Mind group that can help you achieve your goals and help keep you accountable.

Abraham Lincoln said, “Always bear in mind that your own resolution to succeed is more important than any other.” This philosophy is essential to your success. 2015 is your year to say yes to new successes and new opportunities you’ve only dreamed about.

Say yes to yourself

2015 is your year to square your shoulders, hold your head high, and to embrace and believe in the God-given abilities you have as a leader. 2015 is the year to tune out the people who would hold you back by their negative talk and influence. It’s time to cut loose from those who refuse to see your potential and those who desire to hold you back.

2015 is your year to say yes to what you already know in your heart to be true about yourself as a leader so you can run your race with confidence and faith. Where other people have doubted you and have said no to your dreams it’s now time to say yes! 2015 is your year to soar!

Say yes!

 

© 2014 Doug Dickerson